Today, I told my students that I would be absent tomorrow because my wife was giving birth. They burst into applause... not to congratulate me on the new baby. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Today, I told my students that I would be taking a few weeks off because a member of my family is very ill. They all cheered. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, at my job as a second grade teacher, I was explaining to my students how I'm pregnant and will have to take a break from teaching after I have my baby. One of my students replied with "Ooooooooohhh Ms. Johnson had sex!" FML
Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
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Top comments
NoBounceNoPlay 0
So, you're that teacher who everybody hates but is never absent, huh?
3lonelyhearts3 0
Kids are always like that. why is this an fml?
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Comments (159)
D4rkSh0gun 0
honestly what did you expect when a teacher isn't going to be there but somewhere else of course the applause is going to be for that
WildClown 0
You must be a terrible teacher.
housemd1120 0
They were just happy to have a substitute they could manipulate. Some of them may have been applauding for you though
peoc 0
maybe they congratulated you on managing to get laid? .... nine months ago
nobody_special 0
What did you expect? They're students, it means a little break for them. Don't let it get the joy of of the birth of your child down. Oh, and enjoy them while they're cute... s/he will turn out to be quite a handful growing up.
bonafidehustler 0
For you guys saying that he's a terrible teacher, you're just wrong. Kids just get excited to have a substitute teacher. When I was in grade school, we LOVED days where we had substitute teachers because we could get away with whatever we wanted. For instance, we could tell him/her we had an extra hour at recess and they'd believe us. So that's why they were cheering, not because you're a bad teacher. Don't feel bad!
pariah411 0
You're probably just a bitch. They probably all hate you.
J_1182 2
Go die
peoc 0
to add to my #15 comment - its kinda hard for students to picture their teachers having a sex life - same with parents. BTW, you sound like a cool teacher - not alot of teacher i know have ever heard about FML
jazminbliss 2
I do that with withj all my teachers. Even my favorite teacher. Doesnt mean they hate you...well some could if you are that one evil teacher who everyone hopes would die or leave...
Cheskamylife 0
let them know you go on fmylife, they might think you're a little cooler.