Intimacy: Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's...

By Toldyouso - 22/01/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 293

You deserved it 24 621

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

A heads up next time maybe?

By Bob - 07/04/2020 02:00

Today, when my girlfriend walked out the room, for a laugh, I covered my whole body except my knob in blankets. Then when I heard her come back in, I yelled, "Surprise!" It was her mom, who'd dropped by unannounced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 680

You deserved it 1 009

By nudesurprise - 16/04/2009 14:49 - United States

Today, I was at my new apartment. My fiancé was coming home so I filled the apartment with candles and put on some sexy music. When he came up to my door, I answered the door, naked. What I didn't know was that he was bringing his dad to see the new apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 918

You deserved it 35 099

In the mood

By Steve - 16/12/2012 06:25 - United States - Oshkosh

Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 788

You deserved it 18 362

Classic

By Singleagain - 10/01/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 115

By CandlesSuck - 02/11/2009 03:44 - Canada

Today, I invited my girlfriend to come over, telling her I had a surprise. I filled the bathtub and lit a lot of candles to be romantic. She gets here, and we start doing our thing. Until we smell something burning. It was my hair. I now have a bald spot on the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 815

You deserved it 29 353

By SURPRISE - 10/06/2009 00:13 - Canada

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 617

You deserved it 6 819

By willywonks - 21/03/2009 05:33 - United States

Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 165 229

You deserved it 8 312

Romance is dead

By Anonymous - 07/09/2009 06:05 - United States

Today, at my girlfriend's place, I cleaned up her room, put candles everywhere, scented the air, and placed rose petals all over her bed in an attempt to be romantic and loving. The first thing she said when she saw all this was, "Uhhhhgg, I'll have to clean all this up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 370

You deserved it 5 483

By coolhand - 29/08/2009 15:13 - United States

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 512

You deserved it 67 428

By kahemae44 - 27/10/2009 10:20 - United States

Today, I visited my boyfriend's house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 414

You deserved it 5 560

Boddmon 0

Friday 22 January 2010 16:04

Why would your girlfriend knock on her own door? You're an idiot for not realizing it would be someone else.

uhohuscrewedup 0

Friday 22 January 2010 16:17

why do ppl try these things when parents are at home. ydi

Comments

tinypurplegiant 0

Friday 6 May 2011 0:09

a memory that will last FOREVER!

cindayy77 0

Monday 1 August 2011 10:40

Never heard of Kenny G

max13532 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 6:10

Kenny G. WTF

thaaatgirl 4

Friday 28 October 2011 0:35

Kenny G, are you KIDDING ME?

cburke9 7

Friday 28 October 2011 20:21

ok, for one Kenny G is not romantic, two, you shouldve just seduced her mom lol

Mkbitch 2

Friday 6 January 2012 7:30

Mom then told Dad who proceeded to chase you with a bat.

MarissaCristina 13

Thursday 5 April 2012 19:14

Wow. If she still lives with her parents, she probably shouldn't be having sex, which is what I would assume you were planning ti do. Either way, why would y'all try and do it when there are PARENTS in the sane house?!

tournamentdecide 33

Sunday 27 July 2014 23:31

Having sex is legal at the age of 16 in USA.

Benpie 22

Wednesday 17 February 2016 7:03

Age of consent varies from 16-18 in the US depending on state, but because of statutory rape laws, even if two people are under the age of consent, they can still have sex. For example, because of bad law writing, two 11 can have sex and it's perfectly legal, as long as nobody who is older is involved.