Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML
Today, while trying to pick up dog poo, I tripped and landed in the pile. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I felt accomplished after I cleaned the whole house alone, but then I stepped backwards to admire my work and stepped into a pile of dog poop. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Today, I was pet sitting for a friend. As soon as I walked in the door, I stepped in dog poop. I took off my shoes to clean them, then stepped in cat pee in my socks. FML
Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML
Today, I came home to find that my dog had taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He'd also taken a dump in my house shoe. FML
Today, I finally did the splits for the first time in my life! Unfortunately, it happened when I stepped in wet dog poop on my kitchen floor. One foot slipped forward in it, and I fell right on top of it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
WeAreScrewed 3
Aw shit.
that1guyyy 12
Shit happens
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (75)
2ndSucks 15
Silly dogs. Just ******** everywhere.
VickLynx 6
Its not the dogs fault, it's the owner's. It is the duty of the owner to dispose their dogs waste in public.
FarSide 23
Says who?
tylersign 11
Better get some more grass with less shit.
leadman1989 16
That's a scatological situation!
WeAreScrewed 3
Why do my comments always get moderated? Loads of people use profanity on this site and don't get their comments removed :/
chickenwalrus 14
Life ******* hates you
chickenwalrus 14
Life ******* hates you
chickenwalrus 14
Sorry about the triple post... FML screwed me over
chickenwalrus 14
Sorry about the triple post... FML screwed me over
chickenwalrus 14
Life ******* hates you
Clozzie 0
Classic!
chessypie 0
Whats op mean
flockz 20
old penis.
illmatic2 16
Ovulated Penguin
flockz 20
optimus prime.
lucyinthesky420 10
Original Poster ?
clumsychik 1
Orange Prostate
chessypie 0
Thats what she said
HetaliaFreak 10
Orgasmic prostitute!!
KiddNYC1O 22
24- Original poster; spread it.
whoopdydoop69 6
It means Orion's Penis or orgasmic pooping
tylersign 11
Oily Pelvis.
tanneriscool 2
And 61 ruins it... Smh.
robertlovespi 3
Orgasmic Pancakes
ThatOneGuy612 5
Original poster
perdix 31
And when you went to clean off the second shoe, you put the first one in the original pile of shit? I'm imagining a hilarious infinite loop. Anyone with me?
blunttobluntest 12
I am there buddy! It's just a cycle!
Poetaster 10
I'm waiting for the cat shit or... Cow pies?