Miscellaneous: Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first... - FML

By justcomesnaturally - 04/11/2012 00:37 - United States - Danby

Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML

agreeclassic 7 460

vote type 1 34 672

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By Anonymous - 04/01/2015 16:58 - Denmark - Aarhus

Today, I saw a homeless guy in the street. It really upset me how everyone's spirit of giving vanished as soon as Christmas was over, so I said fuck it and gave him about $50 worth of money. I barely made it 10 feet away, when another guy mugged him for the money I just gave. FML

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By groom - 12/12/2008 02:30 - France

Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML

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By HaliMali - 22/02/2015 18:21 - United States - Hastings

Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML

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By oops - 19/04/2011 15:37 - United States

Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML

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By :| - 16/04/2011 02:04 - Canada

Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML

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By Anonymous - 13/11/2012 11:34 - United States - Macungie

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

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By dating a fucking psycho - 14/02/2013 20:06 - United States - Hickory

Today, I tried to give some change to a homeless man. My girlfriend pulled me away and ranted about how homeless people are all basically bastards who deserve their misfortune, and that I shouldn't give "our" money away. FML

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By NightHawk4926 - 09/09/2015 22:15 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man. I gave him my sandwich, since he needed it more than me. Seconds later, he was attacked by a flock of birds. FML

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By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:46 - United States - Tampa

Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML

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By Anonymous - 05/12/2012 20:05 - United States

Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

superswagbro 7

Sunday 4 November 2012 5:36

You are an asshole.

Screwie 25

Sunday 4 November 2012 5:41

Everybody was kungfu fighting~

Comments

piratezombi3 4

Sunday 4 November 2012 20:01

There is a reason there are bum fight videos online. I saw a fight once over an empty shopping cart. They are ruthless.

AverageIsh 2

Monday 5 November 2012 1:20

I'm sorry but this absolutely made my day.

Purplejayy 6

Monday 5 November 2012 1:42

Wow.

baileymarie102 6

Monday 5 November 2012 2:46

Wtf is wrong with you?

John_Cards 2

Monday 5 November 2012 3:32

This is why the world is so jacked up. No empathy from you swine.

mikepzz 27

Monday 5 November 2012 4:32

I just died lol!!!! that's hilarious, you just keep on being douchey op, I find it entertaining

coop1993 0

Monday 5 November 2012 6:06

I'd do the same thing

TheyCallMeDamien 17

Monday 5 November 2012 8:07

aaahhh....humanity

loohoozuuhuur 13

Monday 5 November 2012 14:30

I'm glad you realise that you are a terrible person. Now go and do something about it.

noisebox 1

Monday 5 November 2012 18:43

I don't see that you did anything wrong but you did something a guy would do...

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Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

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Today, my friend got dumped. I wanted to say, "You must be devastated", thinking, "That really sucks." I said, "You must really suck." FML

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Today, I had a big job interview on Zoom. I forgot my name was set as "Fat F***". I joined the call and the older lady interviewing me was very offended. FML

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Today, my mother-in-law said, "I just find I'm not at all confident bottle feeding a baby, as I breastfed all of mine." Thank you for making me feel like s*** for me decision to bottle feed. FML

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Today, the grades for one of my courses were released. The class average was higher than that which the department allowed, so the professor had to scale everyone's marks down to meet the policy. I ended up failing because my class was too smart. FML

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