Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I saw a homeless guy in the street. It really upset me how everyone's spirit of giving vanished as soon as Christmas was over, so I said fuck it and gave him about $50 worth of money. I barely made it 10 feet away, when another guy mugged him for the money I just gave. FML
Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
Today, I tried to give some change to a homeless man. My girlfriend pulled me away and ranted about how homeless people are all basically bastards who deserve their misfortune, and that I shouldn't give "our" money away. FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man. I gave him my sandwich, since he needed it more than me. Seconds later, he was attacked by a flock of birds. FML
Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML
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Top comments
superswagbro 7
You are an asshole.
Screwie 25
Everybody was kungfu fighting~
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Comments (139)
kjb1234 5
Hey you at least know you have a problem and that's good
brand0n93 5
that's not so bad... u were kind enough to give away money and you got to see two bums fight each other
yentlben 2
You, sir, are a supreme asshole.
DannyDeVitoSLAP 1
Where is the Awesome button? That's hilarious a little change and you get to watch the show
jelly713 19
You did the exact opposite of what I would do. That may be cruel but people can always be more cruel. Just work on yourself if you don't want to be a "terrible" human being.
DogsPaw 16
I stopped helping homeless people after I spent 20 dollars on food for some that I saw on the street and they threw at me and called me a bitch.
angel55033 12
At least you are mature enough to recognize & admit it...you're life isn't completely ****** if you are determined to change that and for your sake I hope you are.
AlexRen 21
At least she admitted that she is a sad excuse.
fwongraven 10
And those "bums" could have been just like you, until the recession lost them their jobs so they couldn't afford food, or housing, or meds for a mild mental illness.
VoiceMail 12
Meanwhile, in Australia, the homeless people don't beat eachother up, they threaten to beat you up. :|