birdbath
United States
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
crazystar69
United States
Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML
lbg2msf
Biloxi, United States
Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML
How?
Glasford, United States
Today, a bird crashed into my face. I didn't think that actually happened to people outside of cartoons. FML
shitlicker
La Verne, United States
Today, I lost my balance trying to get my bag out of my car. In doing so, my lips came in contact with some bird poop. FML
Anonymous
Get the **** outta here, kid
Today, I tried to take a picture next to a peacock, but ended up running away with a face and mouth full of feathers. FML
birdsterrifyme
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Sikeston, United States
Face your fears!
Today, I decided to confront my fear of birds when my friend's pet bird was walking up to me. He got on my arm, climbed up, and attacked my face. FML
Joshtodon
All in a day's work!
Today, I was unloading tile boxes out of my pickup truck into this lady's garage. As I grabbed the last 50-pound box, a passing bird shat on my forehead. Green ooze ran down my whole face. FML
craphanded
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United Kingdom
You're welcome…
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
andrea99
United States
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Keaton
United States
Today, I got a bird as a pet. I thought it would be funny to put it on my head and take a picture. When the flash went off the bird flew off my head and pooped at the same time. You could see it in the picture. FML
Top comments
Savvysass 0
Facial!! Don't feel too bad, some people pay big bucks at spas to have shit smooshed all over their faces.
lovexinstead 0
Eww, lol. Those kinds of things don't happen too often XD
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Comments (48)
lostfaithinpppl 19
OP, next time watch where you are going. YDI
kile88 2
you shouldve said instead of "it was so scared it crapped all over me" to "it shit itself on my face. literally. ps pretty sure that if it hit you hard enough it wouldn't be able to control it's bowel.. like this poor cat I tried to save after it was hit by a car pooped itself.. the poor ******* thing.. makes me so sad
Gizmo3K 0
I feel bad for the bird. They have much faster reflexes than us and something must have happened to it for it not to be able to fly out of the way in time.
alwaysalady 0
This did not help my irrational fear of pigeons one bit.
Gitsandshiggles 0
Tamuz (poster #12), you're a dipshit.
techtonictwerp 1
Today I suddenly found myself pressed into a human's face. I was so scared that she was going to try and eat me I lost control of my bowels. FML.
Shereen15 0
Lmao
ashbaby010 0
aw. poor bird.
MrsNickJonas18 0
sucks, FYL
st4rbucksisevil 0
@20: EPIC. WIN.
Harrywhat 0
YDI for hurting nature, bitch.