By TaraBURGER - 17/09/2013 07:57 - United States

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks 58 361
You deserved it 4 338

TaraBURGER tells us more.

TaraBURGER 18

My parents still think that I'm trying to replace them. I don't think they understand that this woman is only technically my mother. She isn't my mommy and never could be. I also found out I have a little sister, which is kinda cool. I haven't even told them about her. I'd get booted out of the family tree. I tried to talk to my parents about it, but they just shut me down every time and pulled the whole, "Are we not good enough for you?" bullshit on me. I went on Facebook and found her right away. She's a very nice lady, but I still just call her by her first name. Like I said, she isn't my momma. Also, I saw something on here about the real mom vs. biological mom debate. Personally, I think saying "real mom" is a bit weird. My real mom is the one that changed my diapers, read to me at night, and comforted me when I came home from school crying. I think biological mom is less offensive to adoptive mothers. I have and will never use the term "real mom" to describe my biological mother.

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Top comments

ygdrassil 17

Just ignore it, OP. They'll stop being touchy when they see that you can love them AND at least know your birth mother.

478 8
The_9th_Doctor 18

good for you. you should have that right. screw what everyone else thinks

341 3

Comments

laurenasabutton 26

It's her adoptive parents that are upset, not her birth parents.

21 0
edanielleh 21

Yeah, i am adopted too, my mom told me that she feels she will be replaced if I meet my birth mom.

7 0
queerdragon 20

FYI, it could be seen as offensive for you to call the "birth parents" the real parents. Anyone I know, who is adopted, has always said that the people who raised them are their parents. While Op is adopted, she does not call her (adopted) father her "fake" dad. I never got this whole thing where bio parents, who do not raise the child, who were not there for all the problems, get called the real parents simply because they push the kid out of their snatch or had some sex.

34 2
spicymeatballs 9

That's retarded, and rather selfish. Obviously, you haven't alienated them in favor of your birth mother... They'll get over it. Just do your best to brush their behaviors off.

4 18
igive 29

There are a variety of words you could have chosen. The internet does not mind cuss words, but to use "retarded" will not go over well.

11 2
spicymeatballs 9

45, I don't practice political correctness. I'm not being disrespectful to someone that is mentally or physically retarded by calling them such in a derogatory way. They're normal people, just like the rest of us; the goal of "awareness" is to make them "equal," no? To expect people to censor their language because it may offend someone who's disabled is to make them special and no longer equal. Pick one.

1 2
1jordan1 11

178: EXACTLY. That's exactly how I feel. People get offended over everything that someone says for no reason. Sometimes I say "gay" as an insult and people get all offended because "some people are gay" and say it shouldn't be an insult. Well, some people are stupid, too, but that doesn't mean you can't call someone. People need to grow up. Thank you for perfectly putting my thoughts into words.

0 2
simsgirlgem 25

geez I think if they treated you well you won't replace your mother who raised you

5 0
karmaliss 18

Hey, yet another adoptee here. I think it's awesome you got to meet her :) Hopefully your family will calm down sooner rather than later. It can be hard to explain to people how even though she's your "real mother" she isn't going to suddenly take over the "Mom" role in your life. It took me a years just to figure out how to phrase that concept to make sense! (I've had to explain it a *lot*...) Anyway the facts remain that 1) they're your family and love you 2) you've now met the woman who have birth to you and 3) your family will eventually realize she has a role completely separate from any of theirs. It'll be ok :)

10 1
Thunderstruck14 30

Wow, how rude. I'm not adopted, but I know some adopted kids want to find their birth parents, and there's nothing wrong with that! Your family definitely should have been more supportive. I find it really sad when parents make their kids feel bad instead of helping them out and being sympathetic or supportive. I know with mothers it can be hard and emotional, but when you care about someone, it means you gotta suck it up and understand that they can meet other people, do other things and stuff you dont like. Meeting your birth mother is perfectly fine. You didn't do anything against the mother who raised you.

4 3
worldclassrager 39

It's their feeling for now...but at least you were not aborted...it should change...

0 8
jw90 18

That's quite immature of them. You have every right to know who gave birth to you.

2 4
Merylwen 24

Surely you can see how that would be hurtful to them, at least a little bit. Your parents are the people who brought you up and loved you all of your life, not whoever pushed you out of their ******. Anyone can physically make a child, but love and upbringing is a different thing. They don't want you to see anyone else as your parents, and why would they? It sounds a little selfish, okay, but it's understandable.

5 3
1jordan1 11

Well obviously they have negative feeling towards it, nobody is saying that being worried is unreasonable, especially the op. but to completely shut her out and call her a bitch for wondering where she came from? THAT is what's unreasonable, immature, and selfish.

0 0