Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I are so close that we share everything. This now includes his head lice. Thanks, dude. FML
Today, I realized that the most romantic thing that my boyfriend and I have done in the last month is comb lice out of each other's hair. FML
Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, I have lice. The dog we rescued infested our house. No amount of showering has made me feel clean, and my bald husband just doesn't understand why I'm so bothered. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. When I leaned in on him, he fell over backwards and smashed his head against the floor. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML
Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend asking if I'd Skype with him. Thinking he'd find my tousled bed hair and big t-shirt sexy, I went on. The first thing he noticed was the massive booger on my face that stretched from my nose to the other side of my cheek. FML
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Top comments
seeoseek 18
Ewwww nasty!!
isallwaysme 27
That's damnruff (horrible pun over)
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Comments (128)
StarJack 9
Would you rather he have lice, or crabs?
itsohsosimple 3
Me too, but I have an ex who is almost a Greek god but somehow has never heard of hygiene. My heart goes out to you, OP ❤
PleadingInsanity 20
Lets be optimistic here. Lice don't like dirty hair so it can't be that bad. Dandruff can be caused by a lot more then an oily scalp including an allergic reaction to shampoo. In conclusion, your boyfriend is allergic to his amazing shampoo that makes his hair so clean it got infested with lice! Yea, we'll just go with that... On another note, at least these things are easy to treat.
catkat1988 17
lol, I like the wording of the FML. I would go along and say that this is an easily fixable problem - but honestly, it's a sign of bad personal hygiene, and him not washing and maintaining his hair properly makes me wonder what other body parts he may be sloppy with.
SillyGirl4602 23
Lice are usually found on clean hair. Also, dandruff doesn't mean he is dirty. He can have a dry scalp or he might not be using the right shampoo.
mattyiscool123 26
Looks like he has never used shampoo before
destroyer1 8
Hes the one
Mimitrixie 11
Ohhh my god. Gross!
jessherself13 21
As revolting as his afflictions are, it still doesn't mean that he's unhygienic or a bad person. He just needs some dandruff shampoo and lice remover. I hope you don't get lice OP, they're a nightmare to get rid of.
Silly_Lilly6969 23
Ewwwww lol he needs some head and shoulders
meintx 9
That's not very gorgeous.