Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I are so close that we share everything. This now includes his head lice. Thanks, dude. FML
Today, I realized that the most romantic thing that my boyfriend and I have done in the last month is comb lice out of each other's hair. FML
Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, I have lice. The dog we rescued infested our house. No amount of showering has made me feel clean, and my bald husband just doesn't understand why I'm so bothered. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. When I leaned in on him, he fell over backwards and smashed his head against the floor. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML
Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend asking if I'd Skype with him. Thinking he'd find my tousled bed hair and big t-shirt sexy, I went on. The first thing he noticed was the massive booger on my face that stretched from my nose to the other side of my cheek. FML
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Top comments
seeoseek 18
Ewwww nasty!!
isallwaysme 27
That's damnruff (horrible pun over)
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Comments (128)
kieralumina 30
I would most likely scream, bat the lice away from me, then cry while still swatting at my arms. then id tell him to get that situation checked. I have an extreme fear of bugs/insects. >.>
ThatAss 14
I suggest telling him he would look hotter with a shaved head... Solved ;)
okibi1 20
I cannot believe no one thought that maybe he did not know he had lice because his head was already itchy from dandruff? And those that say lice do not like greasy hair are correct. They cannot hold on to the strands.
armonicavita 13
Nobody's perfect:)
nvo 6
If you're still interested after the lice treatment, make sure he doesn't have any blind passengers downstairs...
Amishanthony 6
Might need to add a personal hygiene test to your courtship criteria there sport.
nyxiny 22
Actually, lice tend to be more prevalent in people who DO have clean hair. And dandruff is gross, but it doesn't necessarily mean dirty-- just really, really dry.
Morgiepoooh9822 17
Yep he's gorgeous!
Crystal55621 19
Well, some people have seasonal dandruff. The lice though....well...there's no excuse for that.
xgetxbentx 13
He probably has dandruff because of the lice. However, contrary to popular belief, lice prefer extremely clean hair, so despite how it looks he probably does have good hygiene. Shampooing too often with the wrong type of shampoo is also a cause of dandruff/dry scalp. So, make him clear that shit up, but also be thankful that it doesn't mean he never showers.