Today, I invited my long-lost best friend over, because I haven't seen her much since she got a new boyfriend. 20 minutes into hanging out, he showed up at my door. He still hasn't left, and they're having sex on my couch right now. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML
Today, my ex, who I still live with, invited he’s best friend (a drama starter) and his new love interest over for dinner while I was at work. Now I’m outside, waiting for them both to leave. FML
Today, I found that my "lesbian" best friend and roommate is now dating the guy I've been trying to get a date with for weeks. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML
Today, I was in the middle of having sex with my boyfriend, and my drunk best friend knocked on our door. We screamed 'go away' and she still opened the door. She then saw us, and asked if she can join. FML
Today, I came home early from work. My boyfriend and I live together. I open the door and I found my best friend watching TV on the couch, wearing lingerie. The room smelled like sex. She acted irrational and defensive, and had the audacity to ask what I was doing here. Bitch, I live here. FML
Today, my best friend and I were supposed to meet up at an outdoor beer garden. We’ve both had a hard time with quarantine, so it was a great escape. Instead, she kept me waiting for nearly two hours before I finally left. Her excuse? Her boyfriend, who she sees every day, really wanted to have sex. FML
Today, I caught my best friend in bed with my current boyfriend. Apparently watching movies naked is "the new in thing". FML
Today, a girl I knew in high school who now lives out of state came to town to visit and stay over. We've been talking albeit romantically for the past few months. Not thirty minutes after we arrived at my place from the airport, her ex-boyfriend came by and she hopped in his car. I haven't heard from her since. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 2 years and my best friend of 10 years making out in my bedroom. I stared and when they noticed me, my boyfriend didn’t even bat an eye and suggested we have a threesome. My best friend immediately agreed. FML
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Top comments
lilhellian 27
Did you hear the frogs in the wall?
dectivebobby 6
Wow, I don't understand how people can be such rude idiots
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Comments (151)
omgalice 5
A shitty best friend if you ask me, her boyfriend seems quite rude as well
mackdeezy 22
Im sorry, I just hate people like that. Good luck, OP
butterflyfx 8
Yeah she isn't your friend if this is what she does. And you know she told him to come over. No way was that a coincidence. Drop her like a bad habit.
sammyjanette 17
Step 1 get a bucket of cold ice water. Step 2 poor it on your "friend" and her boyfriend. Step 3 tell them to get the **** out of your house. That is just gross.
goose12321 11
*pour
sammyjanette 17
Next time I will proofread. That was an amateur mistake.
chanellgymnast 17
She's been "long lost" for a reason.
musiciangirl591 16
same thing is happening with me and my best friend, just not to the extent that its happening to you (meaning her boyfriend and her don't have sex on my couch), if she doesn't appreciate your friendship, then drop her, sorry, that i sound mean, i don't mean to!
woiz 11
are you sure its a boyfriend not a client ??? probably she told em "I got the place but u have to pay for both place and sex!"
interesting33 37
Can't you tell them to leave? I mean having sex on your couch is a bit far - it is more than reasonable for you to ask them to go.
perdix 31
And this is why we let "long lost" people stay long lost. It's a lot cheaper than getting your couch re-upholstered!
Jacksparrow72 21
I'd throw that couch away. The image would still be in my mind.
Alastrina_fml 20
That's beyond rude, that's downright disrespectful. Why the hell would you ALLOW them to do that at YOUR place? I'd suggest nailing them with a squirt gun if you can't find the guts to say anything.
kinky44 28
I'd squirt them with a nail gun
zandalee 20
What ever happened to spud-guns? Hurts like hell to be shot by one of them. Especially in the gonads