Today, I introduced my mother to my new girlfriend. My mom made a very nasty comment about her in Spanish, not realizing that my girlfriend teaches Spanish at the local school. FML
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Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my family for the first time. My mother's immediate reaction was, "We didn't know you were gay!" No mom, she really is a girl. FML
Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML
Today, my mom started her new job; she's now my new coworker. She's already told the other girl I'd said she talks too much, and has berated me for not calling her "Mom" while at work. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML
Today, I brought my new girlfriend home for dinner. My mom was being unusually quiet, so I thought she was trying to be polite. After dinner, she pulled me aside and asked why I'd never mentioned that my girlfriend had dated my brother. Apparently everyone knew except me. FML
Today, I was hanging with my boyfriend. When his mom came to pick him up, he introduced me. She talked to me politely and I thought we hit it off very well. As I was walking away, I heard her say, "That's your new girlfriend? Honey, you could do so much better." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted get to know my mom, so they went off and had a chat. After an hour, I noticed my girlfriend was gone and my mom was waiting for me. Apparently I've been dumped through my mother. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend’s parents for the first time. I wanted to break the ice, so I brought up a funny story… about my ex-girlfriend, without thinking. The room fell silent, and my girlfriend’s mom just stared at me. My girlfriend left the room in tears. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother is more into me than she is. FML
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Top comments
THEKAISER 4
Es un exito!!!
Meowingtons500 18
Omigod hahahahaha! My Spanish source is a 4 foot tall Colombian, she's not very reliable. XD
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Comments (170)
mikey64speedy 2
This sounds like something that would happen to me
DooleyFTW 17
Not the fml population or the world at large perdix, I just meant a lot of parents could learn to keep their mouths shut when it comes to their son/daughters relationships.
Rylo98 4
Ella es un burro con pelo corto y masculino! XD
linnie_wesker 20
I HATE people that assume everyone around them couldn't possibly understand their native language. I work in a freakin Mexican restaurant and the cooks/bussers will literally stand right next to me and talk about me in Spanish, completely convinced I don't understand a word they're saying. Too bad I understand it all.
Carlson_Jin 0
Those damn Mexicans
GumStickExtraGmail 22
Say "mama, no! she's the loveliest woman you will ever meet!" in Spanish, and then pretend she doesn't know Spanish. it works