Miscellaneous: Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was...

By mjperfetti84 - 22/11/2009 13:53 - United States

Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 483

You deserved it 6 178

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By philip708 - 27/08/2015 06:46 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk and had pissed himself. He decided to thank me with a hug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 710

You deserved it 1 819

By speechless - 01/06/2013 00:50 - United Kingdom - Wallasey

Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 109

You deserved it 6 091

By SpongeAbii2 - 24/01/2012 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 757

You deserved it 2 961

By beckbm23 - 21/11/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 157

You deserved it 2 589

By meesmees - 23/11/2013 10:48 - United States - Severna Park

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 809

You deserved it 6 807

By Anonymous - 08/05/2014 19:00 - United Kingdom - Aylesbury

Today, an old man wanted to give me a tip for bagging his groceries. He slipped some money as deep into my pocket as he could, stroking my thigh for a few long seconds in the process, then he gave me a creepy smile and winked before walking away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 319

You deserved it 4 540

By anonymous - 20/06/2013 01:09 - United States - Houston

Today, I helped an elderly lady put a bookshelf in her car. She then thanked me by hitting me with her car as she drove out of the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 267

You deserved it 3 085

By anniecook - 27/11/2009 00:26 - United States

Today, I saw an old man who needed help crossing the street. I went over to him and helped him across the street. When he thanked me, I said, "No problem, sir." They responded by hitting me in the happy sacks and screaming that they were a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 978

You deserved it 7 244

By yikes :/ - 22/05/2017 18:00

Today, the cute coworker who's been flirting with me drove me home. While I was contemplating asking him to kiss me, he politely told me to, "Please get out, I promised my girlfriend I'd pick her up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 087

You deserved it 1 055

By iceman123432 - 02/09/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, when we were at wrestling practice, we had to bend over to stretch. When I bent down, I noticed a car on the street stopped. There was a sixty year old man watching us. He then licked his lips and drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 121

You deserved it 4 244

OrangeCrayon 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:20

Kinky.

pleasedonttellme 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:32

Omg..like half of the FML's this week are about perverted old men You wonder if it's the same guy ^.^

Comments

tropicthunder 3

Sunday 22 November 2009 22:44

Ok what's the deal with all the old perverted men FML's lately?

waterynuggets 0

Monday 23 November 2009 1:09

This site always has little trends so u kno it'z tru.

ChurchofFagenism 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 22:50

YEAH! GET SOME!

Angry_Dragon 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 23:59

That was phenomenally stupid. Don't EVER do that again. That's one of the ways serial killers lure victims - by acting like someone who needs help. You're lucky he didn't do anything worse than that.

neon_shoes 0

Monday 23 November 2009 5:26

I couldn't agree more. I mean really, how can some people do stuff like that? Do they not have common sense or something? I know I get scared when some person keeps ending up in the same eisle with me at the store. I seriously have no idea on how people have absoltly no idea what so ever when it comes to street smart. It makes me wonder how the same kid napping rutines keep happening over, and over again in the same way as the last one. I can't even watch the news because it freaks me out so much and I have nightmares for days. It really makes me wonder what goes on in some peoples heads.

chapter_vII 0

Monday 23 November 2009 6:37

you are a jackass...i'm pretty sure that the old man who needed a cane to walk is not going to be serial killer...and the way you think is f-ing retarded not everyone is out to get you I have personally helped plenty of people when they are stuck in shitty situations...i've pulled over and helped people with car problems on the highway many times...I helped someone push a car like a billion blocks...i've even helped someone on the street move something into there house because they were having trouble and i'm still here...people have even given me money and fed me for doing things like this...you're a moron and don't forget the old person who needs help with something might be scheming to attack you with their walker/cane then tie you up and kill you