Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street. I walked around until I found it. In a dumpster. I immediately called the cops, completely freaking out. When the cops came, they pulled the baby out of the dumpster. It was a plastic baby doll. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Baby steps
Today, my class got baby dolls for the week to teach us how to be good parents. After school, I went to the store with my mom with the baby doll. When I got home, I realized that I left the baby doll in a shopping cart. FML
Smooth delivery
Today, I was found out when I was a baby, I was abandoned in a dumpster. FML
Get back here!
Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML
Abandoned
Today, I found a baby in a cradle on my doorstep. I was shocked that someone would do this, so I picked it up and uncovered the baby. It was actually a rudimentary stink bomb that went off in my face when I uncovered it. FML
Mall cop
Today, I saw a shady looking customer carrying a very suspicious looking baby stroller with a blanket on top of it. Thinking they were shoplifting, I stopped them before they walked out of the store and snatched it. The attachable car seat came off and there really was a baby in there. A real live crying baby. FML
Good samaritan
Today, I passed a car, and heard a baby crying in the back seat. It was hot and no one was around. All the doors were locked so I broke it with a rock, cutting my arm and setting the alarm off. Only to find out that it was a realistic baby doll. I have to get 7 stitches and pay for the window. FML
Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML
Bad boy
Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML
Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML
Hobbies
Today, it was an unusually hot day and I saw one of my friends walking down the street carrying a large bag. I stopped and asked if he needed a ride. When he got in, I noticed a horrible stench. He then told me he'd just been dumpster diving. FML
Top comments
Aelaena 6
You should have looked inside because if there really was a baby I would have went straight in, not wait for the cops.
redbluegreen 41
You should've checked mate, but your heart's in the right place. I think. If it was a real baby, it could've died between the time you heard it and the time the police came in.
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Comments (342)
shamille 5
yeah maybe it was one of those training babies they make you carry around for a week in Home Ec. pret-ty realistic.
e11e 0
Maybe you should have looked. But kudos for trying to be a good human being.
master565 0
Retard
danisawesomerthe 0
Lol
mehwhateverr 0
#1. good job trying to do the right thing, but...
arcturusvi 0
A crying baby in a dumpster would make a lot of people panic and try to contact the authorities. This could go the other way really quickly. If it had been a real baby and he tried to grab it, it could end really badly. Stumble, fall on the baby, trip. Not sure how deep or what kind of dumpster this is, but if there was enough shit in the way to obscure the fakeness of the doll, I wouldn't chance stumbling around in there either.
Herbal_fml 0
#224, You would be too scared to get dirty and go in a dumpster that you'd risk the life of a baby?!
annnnabananerr 0
That's good you called the cops but you shouldve checked first hah funny.
blechblech 0
U cant tell the differance between a doll and a baby cry?
angorashi 0
There is a required class in most high schools, including mine- Teen Living, part of it is taking care of a plastic baby for a couple days. It SOUNDS damned well realistic enough, so i see how it happened, but calling the cops is probably the last thing i wouldve done. YDI for calling the cops first!