By problems - 19/10/2014 03:03 - New Zealand - Auckland
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Buy some booze, stay at home and have a drunken study session with the old man!
Or hide his keys, cause he ain't responsible enough for them. It kinda sucks. But it isn't fair that you have to choose between studying for something that is important and stressful, or letting someone close to you risk their life and the lives of others. You shouldn't have to hold up your life because he can't be responsible or mature. There's actually a lot you could do about this. But most of the options tear apart family. But you've got to make a decision. At what point do you do something drastic enough to make him stop, but at the risk of making him resent you? No decision along these lines are easy. OP, do something before the police do! Do something before he hurts himself! Do something before he kills someone... Drunk driving is serious.
Sounds like you need to consult somebody you trust, OP. This is serious.
There are a lot more options than the two presented. OP could just call the police, but their dad wouldn't be too happy. The OP could hide the keys, yet again, dad wouldn't be too happy. The OP could arrange with the court to have a breathalyzer installed in the dad's car (you have to have zero alcohol to unlock/start/ drive the car. It will literally tell you to blow into it while driving), but dad wouldn't be too happy. Honestly, not too many family friendly options, but there are more than two. But sincerely, FYL, OP.
Can't you buy him a taxi (if it's just a trip or two) or maybe just hide his keys so he can't leave? That really sucks :(
Or he may get angry/violent. Drunk / alcoholic dad's are the worst, op. I feel for you. If he takes the car or keys from you and drives off drunk, the best (albeit most painful) thing to do may be to report it to the police so they can intervene and get him off the road. Not sure, though, as I'm not familiar with the laws of your country. Best of luck to you on your exams and in dealing with your father. :)
Let him make his own mistakes. Don't hold yourself responsible.
41 - oh i totally agree its unfair. but having knowledge of a crime without doing anything about it or reporting it makes you an accessory. (OP most likely wouldnt get in any trouble since theyre not in the car and didnt supply the booze, and i dont know the laws there, but morally if someone died they would always know they could have stopped it. and im sure op doesnt want their dad to die/get injured)
let him go for it, and report him as a drunk driver to the police. if he kills someone and you knew he was out there youll feel horrible, but you cant be his taxi. he needs to learn. a DUI might help.
my parents arent stupid or irresponsible enough to drink and drive. my mums boyfriend did though and guess what? mum called and reported him to the police. drinking and driving is NOT okay and if youre aware its occuring its your duty to report it otherwise you SHOULD feel responsible for anything that occurs.
I agree, Kasey. It isn't up to OP to protect their father from his mistakes, and it's unfair to OP that they should sacrifice their own education and success because he's an alcoholic. OP needs to put their foot down, stand up to their father, and tell him that they are not going to enable his habit, and that if he's going to drink and drive, they will call the cops.
I agree with 7, except for the "let him go for it" part. I wouldn't let him start driving because I'd be worried the cops wouldn't get there before he hurts or kills himself or someone else. I don't know how it would work, but having the cops arrive while he's getting in the car would seem like a better plan if the timing could be pulled off. But I agree, the dad needs to learn that drinking and driving isn't ok and if it takes the cops arresting him or the drunk tank for him to figure that out than that's his problem.
No kidding, I would call the station number and give them the plate # and car description. School is important and any halfway decent parent knows this and wouldn't make their child choose between dad and a future. Last spring 2 drink community college kids crashed into the side of a local high school. 20 minutes later they would have plowed through a crowd of kids.
Try reaching out to an instructor and explaining your situation. On one hand, he could kill somebody driving drunk. On the other, your grades can have an impact on your future. I would say you should prevent him from driving. Perhaps get the authorities involved? He is being very selfish, OP.