When I try to quit junk food By Lewis - 08/12/2018 18:00 I'm not a quitter! I agree, your life sucks 282 You deserved it 94 Share Tweet Share
Today, I woke up to find my fiancé in the pool with a topless woman he had told me "not to worry about". FML I agree, your life sucks 4 008 You deserved it 399
Today, while working at a certain California theme park in full costume, I was approached by a kid in line, who looked at me and exclaimed, "Hey look, its Indiana Jones!" which felt pretty amazing. His sister, who was maybe seven years old, glanced over at me and said, "No, he's way too fat." FML I agree, your life sucks 43 706 You deserved it 5 166
Today, as I was getting into work, I saw a co-worker of mine walking in front of me. We're really good friends and we joke around a lot, so I jokingly whistled at him and slapped his butt. Turns out it wasn't my friend, it was the new guy. Hello, sexual harassment charges. FML I agree, your life sucks 31 216 You deserved it 17 098
Today, my 5 year old son asked me to explain how he was born. After I told him I had a C-Section, he went to school and told everyone he was born at sea. I found out when the teacher called me. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 436 You deserved it 6 696
Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 374 You deserved it 9 146
Today, I had a problem with my email verification in FML. I contacted support, and they were super helpful and fixed it. But I used my spam email, which automatically sends an immature message to anyone that contacts it. So instead of a, "Thank you", the nice staff member got a, "Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. Go away cheese face." FML I agree, your life sucks 283 You deserved it 1 368
Yup that's me when there is white chocolate in the house 😋