First, Scientology is awesome, I kill kittens

Wear a diaper and drive as fast as u can

Good idea but has spare adult diapers laying around?

Shopping bag and tape. Get creative!

If OP has friends he could get someone to buy some diapers. Or just tough it out!

It will be over in a day, u dont need a doctor

xlax might make it go through faster?...maybe

give the doctor a house call

Go on google maps to find the quickest route to the doctor. And then make sure to check the box next to "avoid shitty situations"

Or wear the "sumo pee blocker" from smosh. :P

I was thinking the op should sit on the toilet for 24 hours and call the doctor for help add a tv, laptop, phone into the bathroom and it will be all good.

#31: that's hilarious!

Asses of fire, your ass would have a movie made after it if you took xlax while having the stomach flu...bad idea.

Why don't you just wait it out you big pussy.

This guy has the right idea

You could go through all of that trouble, or you could just wait it out for a day. You're not going to die, are you?

I'm sure certain fruits will help. Let me check in my collection.. Hmmm not that.. This could do. Here, try a few bananas.

Dude I swear to god I saw that guy in your pic yesterday, he had same clothes he kept looking at me and when he got off the subway he leaned against the door, did a twist and blew me a kiss, which is weird cuz I'm a guy.

Seriously??

Couldn't help but notice that saying "by fear" instead of "for fear" would be much better.

krad24 fails at life for the "first" comment... hope you get well soon OP and don't forget to hydrate

what a crappy situation. (it had to be said!)

Did it?..

Nope

Someone had to do it haha

I clicked comments just to see if someone would do it lol

If only you were single... *sigh* you're very pretty though! Your bf is lucky...

um, me?

Some doctors do house calls

In civilised places almost all doctors make housecalls...

who needs doctors iv gotten stomach flu before and never went to the doctors.. pussies

why don't you ask the doctor to come to you..?

that sounds awful . sorry OP, stomach illnesses are the worst .
maybe you could wait until the storm is over? (even if it is briefly) but you should call someone to come over . I know you're just taking shits, but if you start throwing up, it will be nice to have someone .

I completely agree I have these awful shits all the time!

wear adult diaaper or if your female shift a kotex pad towards that end of buisness. both sexes could opt adult diaper though.

It seems as though this is standard protocol for you..

Stupid ass comment

Funny thing is... Yours is a "stupid ass comment" think before you speak prick....

Btw that last comment was to #124....

Line your car with garbage bags, then let the green apple nasties commence! Easy clean up, plus the car ride will be filled with the sweet feeling of relief.

I jus got that picture in my head ._.