By shitty day - 30/11/2011 10:53 - United States

Today, I have the stomach flu. If my belly growls, I have 30 seconds or less to get to the bathroom. I can't go to the doctor for fear of shitting my pants on the trip there. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 183
You deserved it 2 427
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Top comments

Fruit_Dealer 9

I'm sure certain fruits will help. Let me check in my collection.. Hmmm not that.. This could do. Here, try a few bananas.

58 5

Comments

krad204 21

First, Scientology is awesome, I kill kittens

0 2
m0tl3ycru3 0

Good idea but has spare adult diapers laying around?

15 1
natskie 7

If OP has friends he could get someone to buy some diapers. Or just tough it out!

4 7
evamusical 12

It will be over in a day, u dont need a doctor

5 1
kbtoyz69 9

xlax might make it go through faster?...maybe

1 1
zebraface123 6

give the doctor a house call

3 1
graham11 14

Go on google maps to find the quickest route to the doctor. And then make sure to check the box next to "avoid shitty situations"

7 0
omgcookeys 15

Or wear the "sumo pee blocker" from smosh. :P

2 1
Fudgeblocks 2

I was thinking the op should sit on the toilet for 24 hours and call the doctor for help add a tv, laptop, phone into the bathroom and it will be all good.

2 1
ATSViper 15

Asses of fire, your ass would have a movie made after it if you took xlax while having the stomach flu...bad idea.

2 1
ifinsane 6

Why don't you just wait it out you big pussy.

1 3
theblackishkid1 6

This guy has the right idea

0 0
Prolux_fml 23

You could go through all of that trouble, or you could just wait it out for a day. You're not going to die, are you?

0 0
Fruit_Dealer 9

I'm sure certain fruits will help. Let me check in my collection.. Hmmm not that.. This could do. Here, try a few bananas.

58 5
stephan18 23

Dude I swear to god I saw that guy in your pic yesterday, he had same clothes he kept looking at me and when he got off the subway he leaned against the door, did a twist and blew me a kiss, which is weird cuz I'm a guy.

31 3
Fruit_Dealer 9

Couldn't help but notice that saying "by fear" instead of "for fear" would be much better.

11 3
hobosapien081 10

krad24 fails at life for the "first" comment... hope you get well soon OP and don't forget to hydrate

0 0
The_Great_Zucchi 15

In civilised places almost all doctors make housecalls...

2 16
xiaoxaio 5

who needs doctors iv gotten stomach flu before and never went to the doctors.. *******

2 3
ImBobo_fml 0

why don't you ask the doctor to come to you..?

12 2
uprising_fml 0

that sounds awful . sorry OP, stomach illnesses are the worst . maybe you could wait until the storm is over? (even if it is briefly) but you should call someone to come over . I know you're just taking *****, but if you start throwing up, it will be nice to have someone .

6 0
Exeggcute 5

I completely agree I have these awful ***** all the time!

0 0
wriptidez 0

wear adult diaaper or if your female shift a kotex pad towards that end of buisness. both sexes could opt adult diaper though.

1 9
jackassiddy 8

It seems as though this is standard protocol for you..

14 0
Donniehw 5

Funny thing is... Yours is a "stupid ass comment" think before you speak prick....

2 0
Donniehw 5

Btw that last comment was to #124....

3 0
Badab1ng 5

Line your car with garbage bags, then let the green apple nasties commence! Easy clean up, plus the car ride will be filled with the sweet feeling of relief.

7 1