By shitty day - 30/11/2011 10:53 - United States

Today, I have the stomach flu. If my belly growls, I have 30 seconds or less to get to the bathroom. I can't go to the doctor for fear of shitting my pants on the trip there. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 183
You deserved it 2 427

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I'm sure certain fruits will help. Let me check in my collection.. Hmmm not that.. This could do. Here, try a few bananas.


First, Scientology is awesome, I kill kittens

m0tl3ycru3 0

Good idea but has spare adult diapers laying around?

If OP has friends he could get someone to buy some diapers. Or just tough it out!

It will be over in a day, u dont need a doctor

kbtoyz69 9

xlax might make it go through faster?...maybe

zebraface123 6

Go on google maps to find the quickest route to the doctor. And then make sure to check the box next to "avoid shitty situations"

omgcookeys 15

Or wear the "sumo pee blocker" from smosh. :P

I was thinking the op should sit on the toilet for 24 hours and call the doctor for help add a tv, laptop, phone into the bathroom and it will be all good.

ATSViper 15

Asses of fire, your ass would have a movie made after it if you took xlax while having the stomach flu...bad idea.

ifinsane 6

Why don't you just wait it out you big pussy.

theblackishkid1 6

You could go through all of that trouble, or you could just wait it out for a day. You're not going to die, are you?

I'm sure certain fruits will help. Let me check in my collection.. Hmmm not that.. This could do. Here, try a few bananas.

Dude I swear to god I saw that guy in your pic yesterday, he had same clothes he kept looking at me and when he got off the subway he leaned against the door, did a twist and blew me a kiss, which is weird cuz I'm a guy.

Couldn't help but notice that saying "by fear" instead of "for fear" would be much better.

krad24 fails at life for the "first" comment... hope you get well soon OP and don't forget to hydrate

In civilised places almost all doctors make housecalls...

who needs doctors iv gotten stomach flu before and never went to the doctors.. *******

why don't you ask the doctor to come to you..?

uprising_fml 0

that sounds awful . sorry OP, stomach illnesses are the worst . maybe you could wait until the storm is over? (even if it is briefly) but you should call someone to come over . I know you're just taking *****, but if you start throwing up, it will be nice to have someone .

I completely agree I have these awful ***** all the time!

wriptidez 0

wear adult diaaper or if your female shift a kotex pad towards that end of buisness. both sexes could opt adult diaper though.

It seems as though this is standard protocol for you..

Donniehw 5

Funny thing is... Yours is a "stupid ass comment" think before you speak prick....

Donniehw 5

Btw that last comment was to #124....

Badab1ng 5

Line your car with garbage bags, then let the green apple nasties commence! Easy clean up, plus the car ride will be filled with the sweet feeling of relief.