By Dead_Fox - 21/11/2012 05:48 - United States - Jonesboro

Spicy
Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 880
You deserved it 3 890
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

Zestus 19

is it even possible to cockblock yourself?

203 6
NothernNightmare 18

OCD or not, using a condom is always a good thing.

186 10

Comments

NothernNightmare 18

OCD or not, using a condom is always a good thing.

186 10
SenselessPattern 12

Protection is especially important in dreams to prevent dream-herpes. Just be glad the woman in your dream didn't turn into a shark or tree shredder halfway through.

53 1
perdix 29

It's always a wise thing, but it's never a good thing.

31 6
xlord 27

Protection is also extremely important when being mind ******. Some people have really dirty minds....

24 1
charvisioku 22

I agree with 18 here... it's definitely the more sensible thing to do, but god they don't half ruin it... they feel shit.

7 2
gmaniac93 7

Haha, well thats a DICK move on your part, thats gotta SUCK.

0 23
unknown_user5566 26

33- Then you must love unexpected pregancies and STD's!

16 3
mduffy08 8

15 - I remember when I was diagnosed with dream AIDS, then I woke up.

8 1
LiveLoveBeatles 19

33- you must get that from your parents, huh?

12 1
israelnotjacob 20

I have to say YDI because even though OCD typically isn't by choice, if it's this serious that you can't even enjoy a dam sex dream you're clearly not dealing with it, and that is your fault.

0 2
MikeFoxtrot01594 11

94 It's not an OCD. I have OP's problem when writing "erotic literature."

0 1
Zestus 19

is it even possible to cockblock yourself?

203 6
Feared 9

Definitely. The following can usually do the trick: -Insulting your partner. -Farting -Sticking it in the wrong hole. -Menstration. -Pointing out, that there is a way hotter guy/girl to sleep with. -Reading FML's when you should be paying attention to your partner.

61 4
xlord 27

Saying "I love you *insert sisters name*"

37 3
unknown_user5566 26

49- I think #20 meant that as a self-"****"block for a woman.

26 1
Jonaahhhh 12

Yes. Wear one of the hats with the propeller on top. Or use "Swag" and "Yolo".... Surefire **** blocks

27 1
trivel64 16

I would totally do a guy with a propellor cap tho

18 2
Noxialis 9

#73 - In that case, look me up, eh. I'll spin you right round ;)

12 4
lhazz11 23

Well, at least we know you'll use it in real life:)

52 7
Feared 9

Or you could just wear one to bed. Problem solved.

15 1
Puffytruffles 18

Better than having sexual relations with a rubber duck.

0 1
XPetrova 10

Look at it as a warning or a prophecy for the future...

13 12
xlord 27

I had a dream where I became batman and king of russia in the same day. Can I look at mine as a prophecy?

13 1
Stealthed 8

Dream? That is pretty much vladimir putin's life summed up. I don't think I've ever once seen that guy turn around to look at an awesome explosion behind him. Not once..

7 1
SammyS2012 21

Well now you can't become batman because you blew your future secret identity :/

4 1
lilhellian 26

By the way it's a reference to the guy who hit his nut on the table. He hit them three times.

2 19
Schizomaniac 24

It was a noble attempt, bud.

32 0
2pepper3 10

Practicing safe habits pays off, kids are expensive...

31 5
chubbybunny963 7

Don't let your affection give her an infection. Put some protection on that erection!

35 2
RedPillSucks 31

@40 put on a wrapper before you tap her.

15 4
Stealthed 8

You can't go wrong, if you shield your dong!

14 1
ardencred 7

You can't go wrong if you shield your dong!

2 5
challan 19

That's a good thing OP! Tomorrow night you may have dreamt you were a guest on Maury! You are the dream father!!

35 3
geon_olam 17

I think you have to learn the difference between OCD and common sense. Not wanting to have sex without a condom isn't an abnormal disorder- it's very reasonable. The panic attack sucks though.

25 9
shannonreneee 11

9, people do self diagnose, but it could genuinely be OCD. I have OCD induced dreams about events in my life I cannot control and obsess over incessantly (it's been diagnosed).

5 4