By Hollywoodanonymous - 31/10/2011 06:57 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had a relaxing night watching movies with my room-mates. Everyone but I had a girl over to lie with during the movie. The closest I got all night was the multiple times my room-mate's dog tried to mount me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 645
You deserved it 3 935

Same thing different taste

Top comments

A jar of peanut butter and you could of had a fun night.

Poetaster 10

Dog: ... Knew I should have brought the bitch from down the hall... This guy is never gonna put out- FML

Comments

RedPillSucks 31

quit your complaining... Sometimes you gotta take what you an get.

A jar of peanut butter and you could of had a fun night.

leadman1989 15
aruam365 24

I know that was a joke, and it wasn't serious at all. But, that is really disgusting to even joke about.

enonymous 8

40 - If it'd make you feel better I can give you a toothbrush to make you feel more included in the fun :)

Would you at least give me back my toothbrush once your done using it to apply peanut butter to your balls? And no, I don't want it in any vaginas. Assholes are okay though.

42 - I'm sorry that not everyone gets your FML references.

Dude it's the internet, there's way worse stuff out there

ImFrackinBored 13
slushpup9696 12

Somebody's either a lesbian or into **********...

fthislyfe 22

Uh well, he kind of insulted women so she answered back! So #4 must be into ********** too. I'm a straight girl but I can't deny the fact that sometimes dogs are more faithful than men.

I insulted woman? It was a joke and no I'm not into **********

^^ comin from the guy who said dogs are more fun than women..

GrammarNazzzzzi 6

It goes both ways... Sometimes dogs are more faithful than women

Poetaster 10

Dog: ... Knew I should have brought the bitch from down the hall... This guy is never gonna put out- FML

The dog would never hurt you like a girl would. Dogs will love you unconditionally no matter what. Your better off

fthislyfe 22

Do you want someone who would be there when you need him? Do you want a man who'd watch romantic movies with you all night without complaining? Do you want a faithful guy who'd never cheat on you no matter what? Get a dog!

perdix 29

Actually, a male dog will **** any bitch in heat. It's their nature, but then again, you shouldn't be requiring fidelity from your dog. Dogs are the best pets, though.

And it took you the whole night to realise this? Are you expecting a girl to magically materialize in front of you and love you unconditionally? Get off your ass and go meet someone.

You can't just "go and meet someone" magically either. You're making it look like it's easy.

fthislyfe 22

Well at least he should try! It's better than sitting at home whining about being lonely.

Quasar - you're right, there's nothing magical about it. It's all rather mundane. Here's how it's done: Step 1: Walk outside Step 2: See people Nowhere in those 2 easy steps do you see "Sit on the couch and complain".

He should talk it over with the dog first to see of it's OK to see/meet other people. Looks like only the dog is putting in an effort in the relationship.

Maybe a girl wont materialize, but enough nights watching movies cuddling up with the dog and that manatee will turn into a mermaid.

Meating someone is easier than meeting someone.

Yup Docbastard is still THE BEST here. I don't give a shit if you agree or not, he is pure logical. Now **** off.....

RedPillSucks 31

Well, he did say he was having a relaxing time. I guess the dog wasn't so bad after all.

1JDub 6

A little bit o peanutbutter can take ya a long way with Fido....o ya, FYL

Everyone but knew in advance? Why didn't you ask a girl over?