Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got fired from the job I'd had for eleven years for going onto Facebook while on the clock. When I got home, I saw that my boss had updated his status, from work, to "Finally fired that bitch." FML
Today, at work, I stepped out for a few minutes to use the bathroom. Shortly after returning, I found out the hard way that one of my coworkers had used my computer to send a profanity-filled email to our boss, calling him an asshole and telling him to go fuck himself. I'm now jobless. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for having Facebook open at work. That's fine, I closed it and continued on with my work. In a meeting later on I could see the reflection of my boss's laptop screen in a mirror behind her desk. For two hours, I watched her scroll through her Facebook feed. FML
Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML
Rookie mistake
Today, I was working from home. I felt very sleepy, so I set my online status “Active” and went back to bed. I woke up to 3 missed calls from my boss and an email from him, containing a webcam screenshot of me asleep in bed. I totally forgot he has remote access to my computer. FML
Today, after working the night shift, I accidentally left my iPod at the office. I woke up later and went on Facebook. To my dismay, I saw some coworker had posted stuff on my wall, such as, "I really have to take a shit!" and "Yes, my tits are real!" FML
Today, my boss and I were bragging about our new phones. I unlocked mine to show its awesome display, and accidentally opened a job search app. FML
I know that sound
Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss's office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML
Unfair
Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out for doing some random web browsing while waiting for some documents I needed to arrive, then went back to his desk and went on Facebook, thinking I couldn't see. FML
Top comments
desireev 18
One of the first things an employer of an office environment will tell you is "Stay off of Facebook!" Sorry, OP.. But YDI. You knew it was a rule and you broke it.
nephilim241 19
Managing.. Like a boss
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (248)
brianjman14 23
Hahaha! That was ******* awesome of your boss!! YDI by the way. Do your job next time.
brunokona 4
FYL damn. Clean history too setting, Internet options, delete browsing history
thatdesertdude 7
Only works if your working for a very small company. Any employer large enough to have an IT department will be able to track your browsing habits. Simple solution: Use work computers for work, Facebook can wait.
Torva_fml 16
What if it's a Mac?
Locoluis 15
Uh... those programs used for tracking workers' online activity don't run at the workers' desktop computers. Your office's computers (Windows, Mac, Linux, etc) are at an Intranet that's behind a firewall. All connections to the Internet must necessarily pass through the firewall. The firewall offers a lot of services for the Intranet: - Firewalling to permit or deny access to network services considered harmful. - DHCP for assigning network numbers to each computer - NAT so that each computer can connect from the inside to the outside. - A proxy that caches frequently accessed web pages and tracks what websites are being accessed by whom. - Usually, computers from the outside can't connect to the computers at the Intranet. Port forwarding allows certain connections from the outside to the inside. - etc.
The_Troller 14
You just got owned! And your boss has an epic sense of humor.
hateevryone 15
well, i hope you can take a hint.
AnagenisisZagus 13
So...where do you work? I would like to make a job application.
sarbear293 4
Facebook has taken over. Why risk your job to get on a social network?
desireev 18
Facebook is the worst! It's turning the world into cyber-zombies!! It ruins friendships and relationships.. And now it's causing people to lose their jobs! In all seriousness, OP should have known better. The workplace is NOT the place to be on Facebook!
Ergayles 9
^ I disagree. It's not facebook itself that ruins relationships, gets people fired, etc. It's the people on there that choose to create drama, and idiots like op that decide to use the company computer to update his status because he couldn't wait a couple hours to do it. Facebook is cool, but it'll only get better if people moderated their use of it. Just my opinion.
docscientist 10
32- it's how people use Facebook, and people's reaction to Facebook. Did op really waste valuable time by checking Facebook? Maybe not, but companies nowadays want you to be constantly working, which actually lowers productivity. We aren't supposed to be performing menial, repetitive tasks over and over throughout the day. It's exhaustive and there's a severe lack of stimulation. I allow people to distract themselves while in lab, as long as they get the work done and don't abuse it, I don't really care.
Dcm210 19
or you can talk to him about getting your job back or report him for invasion of privacy.
AmbrosiaWriter 17
It's not invasion of privacy if the employee (OP) left his facebook account logged in on a WORK COMPUTER. You have no expectation of privacy on computers owned by the company, therefore, no invasion of privacy. If the cops came in to your cubicle to search it your boss can give them the go ahead, because you don't own your cubicle, the boss does. Same with lockers at public schools if the principal gives the go ahead (not sure about private schools, though I would assume it's the same.)
ksackal91 0
Invasion of privacy? It was the work computer. There is no privacy when it comes to property that the company owns.
mikeymayhem_87 15
On top of what they said, companies can keep logs or even screen watch from another computer to keep things in check. No privacy what so ever...
ChaosAngel17 14
I want to 'Like' this! Oh wait...
jerseyboy732 16
Wouldn't it be ironic if you worked for MySpace?
DocBastard 40
I can only hope he WASN'T JOKING. Do your job at work and save your social networking bullshit for when you are on YOUR time. Don't expect to get paid for ******* around, asshat. You're the exact reason why Internet filters were invented. Well, that and to prevent children from viewing evil websites like "Fmylife.com".
spazz666 18
Mmmmmm.... I wanted to thumb down your comment and then I realized you used the word "asshat".......... Thumbs up! I completely disagree with you though.
KiddNYC1O 22
Maybe op was on lunch break...