Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML
Today, I was teaching a small group of improv students. I asked one guy to do a monologue, and laughed to myself while he did so. I said, "Sorry, I'm just laughing at the way you're doing it." He then got upset and pointed out that he had a speech impediment. FML
Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML
Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML
Today, I was in the break room with my colleagues and our awful boss. As ever, he was talking trash, convinced that his jokes were actually funny. The window was open, and it was chilly. As he walked by it, I mangled my words and said, "Cedric, could you please shut your mouth?" FML
Today, my new boss lost his shit and flew into a ten minute rant against me about the "value of respect". He told me that if I wanted to stay in "his" company, I'd best start toeing the line. All this because I corrected his misuse of "your" and "you're" in one of his memos. FML
Today, I overheard my boss and a co-worker talking about me. Apparently when I speak, I slur my words so badly that it sounds like I'm speaking in tongues. According to my boss, "he could be possessed by a demon right now, and we'd never even notice." FML
Today, I gave my boss a nickname. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately, "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML
Today, I mistakenly sent a voice message to my boss while imitating him in a comical way. The message contained my spot-on impression, complete with exaggerated jargon and phrases he frequently uses. I didn't realize it until I received a reply saying, "LOL, nailed it!" FML
Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML
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Top comments
Beansforbill 14
The odds of him impersonating Sylvester the cat are much lower than him having a speech impediment ..
DenBriZel 31
FYL for the mixup OP but next time id be a bit more careful on how you ask about it.
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Comments (83)
ZY1431 24
some people can be an ass about such things.
Beansforbill 14
The odds of him impersonating Sylvester the cat are much lower than him having a speech impediment ..
worldclassrager 41
I am surprised you still have a job....
Dinonick 15
You didnt know. No harm done....except to his self esteem....and to standing with your boss......and your reputation....but other than that you're fine
Nyx_fml 23
You sound like a glass-half-full kind of person.
Dinonick 15
Wow. Thats the first time someone said i'm a positive person Usually its: "Damn, you're a cynical bastard aren't you?" I usually take that as a compliment
Nyx_fml 23
I... was joking. Keep being that cynical bastard you. *pats head*
Lilo4life 26
What made you think it was a good time to try and impress by being a smartass? In what story has assuming people are faking their voice ever been a positive experience?
Omfgitsmia 15
I would have loved to be a fly on the wall for this lol fyl sorry OP.
Axipiter 24
I would hate to be a fly. Buzzing around shit all day and being swatted at. Seriously, how could anyone want to be a fly?
LumpLegacy 15
Man that sucks. My sister studders really bad and people always think shes joking. Shes learned to laugh it off. Im sure your boss will to when he calms down. Gl op
cryssycakesx3 23
I bet she stutters even.
FracturedMinds 21
When my stutter kicks in, it's never even. it's a jumbled mess.
cheshireau 26
Why would you antagonise the boss? Really? Honest mistake or not, you should have just let it be.
joea21 21
Good, next time don't be a jackass to the man that pays your bills
ShakeDisPlace 10
Better contact Warner bros. to cover your back OP.