Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML
Today, I was teaching a small group of improv students. I asked one guy to do a monologue, and laughed to myself while he did so. I said, "Sorry, I'm just laughing at the way you're doing it." He then got upset and pointed out that he had a speech impediment. FML
Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML
Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML
Today, I was in the break room with my colleagues and our awful boss. As ever, he was talking trash, convinced that his jokes were actually funny. The window was open, and it was chilly. As he walked by it, I mangled my words and said, "Cedric, could you please shut your mouth?" FML
Today, my new boss lost his shit and flew into a ten minute rant against me about the "value of respect". He told me that if I wanted to stay in "his" company, I'd best start toeing the line. All this because I corrected his misuse of "your" and "you're" in one of his memos. FML
Today, I overheard my boss and a co-worker talking about me. Apparently when I speak, I slur my words so badly that it sounds like I'm speaking in tongues. According to my boss, "he could be possessed by a demon right now, and we'd never even notice." FML
Today, I gave my boss a nickname. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately, "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML
Today, I mistakenly sent a voice message to my boss while imitating him in a comical way. The message contained my spot-on impression, complete with exaggerated jargon and phrases he frequently uses. I didn't realize it until I received a reply saying, "LOL, nailed it!" FML
Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML
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Top comments
Beansforbill 14
The odds of him impersonating Sylvester the cat are much lower than him having a speech impediment ..
DenBriZel 31
FYL for the mixup OP but next time id be a bit more careful on how you ask about it.
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Comments (83)
brokenperfectnes 15
Never take those kinds of risks when you have a new boss
camhos 7
Yeah, you're a an asshole.
AloysiusWeasley 15
Wow, I haven't clicked the YDI button so fast in a long time.
DopeGrapez 5
i have a speech impediment and i take offense to anyone who makes fun of the way i speak or even makes a joke about it . it sucks to have one so YDI in this case...
iwadasn 33
When you meet someone for the first time and they appear to have a speech impediment, it's always safest to assume that they actually do have a speech impediment. Especially if it's your boss.
JKPwnage 27
Understandable. I wouldn't've guessed it either, and I, too, would've felt extremely ******* awkward after.
cchuckcloninger 5
You mean "soon to be" ex boss?
Hypnotic5206 10
lol that's hilarious lol!
threer 30
I feel OP's boss. I have a really bad stutter when I mess up a word and when I'm stuttering, people tend to roll their eyes, and sometimes it really sucks. I just stop everything and try to say it slowly. You did it on accident, but some of the bullying really hurts, even the small stuff.
fantasyworld 39
Never assume.