Today, I got dragged along to a family dinner. Some idiot invited my douchebag vegan uncle, who spent half the night making condescending remarks and lecturing us on how disgusting it was to have steak on offer at the table. A fistfight eventually erupted, and the cops were called. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my family dragged me to a steakhouse, knowing full well I'm vegan. I sat there, with my sad little salad, watching as they stuffed themselves with burned animal flesh and laughed at me. They wonder why I hate them all. FML
Today, I reluctantly agreed to bring my boyfriend home to meet my family. He said he wasn’t easily scared and could handle a “weird” family. Two hours later, there was a massive brawl when one uncle hit the other’s wife after she threw wine in his face. Tables were flipped, cops were called. Shit. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. It went well, until my dad got drunk and started telling everyone about how "midgets" are assholes and are ruining America. FML
Today, I went to a family dinner. My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut for not wearing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", and then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me. No wonder I hardly ever visit these people. FML
Today, it was my birthday. We had a huge family dinner and everyone was invited, including my boyfriend. My family is kind of stuck-up, so I was very nervous about him meeting them. He got into an argument with my uncle over how "awesome" Van Halen is, and ignored me all night. FML
Today, I got dragged to a wedding where I knew no-one. It went on for hours, I got so hungry. We get to the meal, my wife had forgotten to order a vegetarian meal for me. I couldn't eat the main meal, due to allergies and no alternative. I then spent two more hours just waiting to go home. FML
Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML
Today, I went to dinner with my husband's family to celebrate our nephew's birthday. He spent the entire dinner flirting with his sister, then got offended when I said that his behavior was weird. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML
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Top comments
Bano360 25
Most vegans I know are very arrogant and annoying.
Welshite 40
Hey, vegetables have feelings too; I've heard they grow better when sung to. This is why I subsist on a diet of water and dirt.
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Comments (132)
Sputnikspak 13
I'm a vegetarian for health reasons (kidney problems related to Lupus, have to be very careful of protein intake), but I cannot fathom people who get all uppity that other people are eating meat. Vegetarianism/veganism is a CHOICE. Also? If I'm going somewhere that potentially won't have things that are safe for me to eat, I'll make a side dish that can function as a main for me (like chili). Because that is the intelligent and polite thing to do.
worldclassrager 41
Vegetables are more important than meet on the good pyramid as it is but that ha to be eventful...
JanisEvans 10
The food pyramid is a lie.
worldclassrager 41
And he will probably not be invited over to dinner again unless it's just orderves and board/card games with drinks...
worldclassrager 41
orderves*
shellzy 20
Hors d'oeuvres. If you're going to correct yourself, do it correctly.
jonha21 11
He probley had it coming
gregnc_fml 18
Douchebag! Oh wait a minute, you called him that already! Double Douchebag!
BMF96 5
Sure, the uncle shouldn't have made such a big deal out of it, but as a vegetarian, it is pretty uncomfortable to be right next to meat when you don't eat it for health and moral reasons. And to the comments about vegans pushing their beliefs on people. That is not just vegans and Christians. It's not that vegans push their beliefs on people. People push their beliefs onto other people. The kind of people that try to force their beliefs on you will do it no matter what their beliefs are, because that is what they do.
djxerxes9000 18
Ah vegans theyre a strange bunch
Tegz0rz 12
It's funny how vegans act so condescending for being vegan. In the animal kingdom, a herbivore wouldn't have time to boast, as the carnivore would have already eaten the herbivore. Long story short: we should eat vegans.
The_Honey_Badger 17
Damn. My friend is a vegan but she doesn't mind my eating habits at all. That sucks.