Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got asked out for the first time in my life. During a prank call. By a complete stranger. FML
Today, I had an important job interview. The interviewer really seemed to like me. Instead of hiring me, he asked me out on a date. FML
Today, I was finally asked out on a date after a year of being single. Turns out he got the wrong number. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML
Today, for the first time in more than two years, a guy asked me out. Too bad he lives halfway around the world. FML
Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He told me he'd have to ask his dad if it was OK. I thought he was just kidding, until he pulled out his phone and called his dad. After a few minutes of "Come on, Dad" and "But why?" he hung up and said his dad wouldn't let him. He's 22. FML
Today, after a year and half of being single, I was asked out on a date. I was asked by a married man. FML
Today, one of my guy friends, who I’m not interested in romantically, asked me out on a date. This is the third time a "friend" has asked me out on a date. FML
Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML
Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML
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Top comments
epicwaffles 7
You are learning, young padawan.
Redoxx_fml 22
And marry his mother?
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Comments (180)
madison8895 11
What a keeper.
meruu_2005 1
Rofl sounds like a Hollywood movie
Gondile 4
Then let fate take its course. Little do you know that his father is infact, the leader of Syria
apocalyptic_1125 0
Epic.
teddybayer11 5
now I never said anything about killing him! I said I wanted to get *rid* of him!
lleej 1
Alternate Universe Sasuke?
fanaticdragon 10
Neither can live while the other survives, perhaps?
whatwhyhoo 10
He was testing to see if you like Star Wars.
Superllama12 11
Was his name Oedipus?
shaggy2sly 0
Third times a charm. Hello im Robert