Work: Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's...

By Anonymous - 13/06/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's home. To my surprise, the white expensive carpet was dyed grey due to something in the solution. The owner held me hostage in her house by barracading the door until my manager got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 561

You deserved it 9 092

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Same thing different taste

By JB - 07/12/2011 14:29 - United States

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 013

You deserved it 28 751

By carpetoops - 21/06/2009 16:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I spilt purple washing detergent all over my white carpet. Desperate to get it up I grabbed a blue towel and started mopping it up. The detergent hasn't stained the carpet at all, the blue dye from the towel has. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 838

You deserved it 35 558

By gypsy - 24/06/2011 02:00 - Australia

Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 283

You deserved it 37 751

Creepy and spooky

By Dino - 12/10/2012 06:36 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 750

You deserved it 2 373

By Danielle - 09/04/2011 23:00 - United States

Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 325

You deserved it 27 381

By kebaby - 19/06/2010 23:19 - United States

Today, I spent a long time steam-cleaning a mystery stain on my living room carpet. I turned the light on to get a better look at it, and realized that it was a shadow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 941

You deserved it 48 193

Welcome back!

By Terry - 21/02/2023 08:00 - United States - Tampa

Today, my girlfriend works for a company that cleans VRBOs, so while she went to see family for a week, I asked her coworkers to come clean while she was gone, even the owner of the company showed up, They deep-cleaned house, but when she got home I got yelled at for a dirty coffee mug on my desk. The coffee was still warm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 088

You deserved it 118

Deadly cocktail

By blame the maid - 13/09/2020 17:02 - United States

Today, my very sheltered girlfriend decided to surprise me by cleaning our apartment. Although she grew up with housekeepers and maids, I thought it was common knowledge that you don’t try cleaning the bathroom with both bleach and ammonia. We still can’t go back inside our place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 648

You deserved it 167

Don't let the bedbugs bite!

By sleepingonthetoilet - 28/03/2018 08:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, my supervisor locked me in the women's bathroom as I was cleaning it. I heard the owner scolding him, so I waited for the door to open, thinking he got in trouble. It wasn't until I heard the front gate locking that I realized I'm staying the night in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 525

You deserved it 390

Silly idiot

By Heather - 04/03/2010 12:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I was quite happily glossing my new bathroom door, when my useless, alcoholic, housemate came rolling in, knocked the paint over, stood in it, and without realising, walked it all the way down the stairs. I had just had a brand new carpet fitted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 245

You deserved it 3 695

manoverboard 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Well, if it was THAT expensive, they shouldn't have taken the chance. I said it's their fault.

SadinSherman 16

Monday 3 October 2011 18:44

A job is a job

Comments

swordknight 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:57

FYL, barracading is just over the top.

kyleinsane 0

Wednesday 19 May 2010 5:43

move the shit, tea bag the lady, take a shit on the carpet, and walk out

friedpwnadge 25

Sunday 16 February 2014 18:49

False imprisonment, anyone?

Fmylifffeee 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:58

creepy...

imajinethat 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:58

YDI for being one of those lame door-to-door vacuum salesmen.

SadinSherman 16

Monday 3 October 2011 18:44

A job is a job

jskains 6

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:59

That is also very illegal. (2nd? How old are you? 5?)

cucuto89 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Cool Story Bro

manoverboard 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Well, if it was THAT expensive, they shouldn't have taken the chance. I said it's their fault.

falcon_paunch 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Err.. I don't think the owner can do that... D:

albinorhino 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:06

Cheap vaccum

Hustlinpimp 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:08

wow, ur a guy and the female owner of the house kept you hostage? man up next time ya sissy

AshleyRose784 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:10

You should have called the cops, she can't do that

DinoRawwr 0

Tuesday 20 July 2010 22:33

OP, get a better job, and maybe you won't have this problem =]

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The Top

Today, I caught my husband of 13 years looking at other women in Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 418

Today, I spent an entire hour talking to someone at a party. I was feeling a real connection, only to find out halfway through the conversation that she wasn’t actually a guest, she was the caterer who just happened to be really nice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 192

The Top

Today, my husband drank way too much white wine at a wedding and projectile vomited all over me and my car while I was driving. We were 5 miles from home and I have emetophobia (the fear of vomit/vomiting). FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 179

Today, I brought my car into the shop because it kept picking up speed on its own and I was panicking. A mere $200 later, it turns out I didn’t put my car mat in right and it was sitting on my gas pedal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 766

You deserved it 4 024

Today, while staying at my mother’s house, she messaged me at 5:45 a.m. saying she “desperately” needed my help. I rushed over to her, only to find out she'd lied. She actually wanted me to help clean her garbage dump of a room. I’m starting to remember why I don’t visit often. FML

I agree, your life sucks 919

You deserved it 121

Today, I discovered just how picky my son is. In addition to understandably not eating vegetables, he also doesn’t eat chicken fingers, pizza, or ice cream, along with several other foods I assumed all kids love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 618

You deserved it 357

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 427

You deserved it 763

Today, I found out that my bathroom electrical outlet has a feature unique from the others, where it turns off on it's own and has to be reset. I found this out after returning an electric toothbrush for a refund, then paying double for another one, thinking the first one's charger didn't work thanks to the outlet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 467

Same thing different taste

Creepy and spooky

Welcome back!

Deadly cocktail

Don't let the bedbugs bite!

Silly idiot

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