Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML
Today, I tutored a kid for two hours, for $25 an hour. When it came time for them to pay, my mother told the kid's parents that they could give me ten bucks for the whole thing. She does this a lot. FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, I found out the man I have been dating is my son’s principal. I found out by having to pick my suspended son up from school. FML
Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML
Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML
Today, I found out that the money my husband and I gave to my son for university courses, has instead been spent on pole dancing lessons. FML
Today, I found out my mom paid my best friend $20 to be my friend when we were 10. FML
Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML
Today, I found out my son was never accepted into the local university two years ago. He actually went out and got a job, and only lied about it so he could keep living in my house rent-free. The conniving bastard makes more than I do at my minimum-wage job. FML
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Top comments
Giants_rule 0
Damn thats smart on your sons part. $20 an hour to bang his gf.
jasmine1259 2
how did you not figure that out?
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Comments (156)
purple91 8
Paying for your own son's *****... brilliant
Brey1013 0
Stop complaining. You have a brilliant son.
insovietrussia1 0
omg thats a great idea!! thanks!!
AlexZB 0
just making out? your son is either a loser or 13 years old
Dubstep_fml 1
the kid wins. you fail
wilt 0
Why are you taking advice from your kids??? Whose the parent? Couldn't take a little time out of your schuedule to talk to the school? YDI
yankeesfan130225 0
so pretty much u were paying a future prostitute for your son.
bmiawcb1 0
Has no one else noticed the horrible typo? "I was paying $20 an hour to make out with my son..." LOL I REALLY hope you typed it that way on accident...
Ashter 20
Lol. When I first read it, I thought there was a typo too. But after a reread, I saw that it read, "I was paying her $20 an hour to make out with my son in his room." Eyes just missed the "her". Now, on the other hand. This kid deserves the hall of fame right next to the guy who got girls in his room by convincing his parents he was gay. Seriously, what a genius. He got laid and got his girlfriend a paying job. She's gonna stay with him for a while. lol.
ohmandapants 17
well...atleast we can trust the education system to make kids smarter than their parents!