Today, I found out that the crumbs on the couch that look like the Oreos you just ate, can actually turn out to be very crunchy, and have legs. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I have been home sick and depressed for so long that I just found Oreo crumbs in my belly button. FML
Today, I was hungry and decided to nibble on some Cheez-Its I had in my room. After I'd enjoyed some of them, I looked into the box to see how many I had left, where I noticed a lot of little black moving dots. Apparently I wasn't the only one enjoying the crackers. FML
Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML
Today, I polished off the delicious iced gingerbread cookies in the pantry. I'd assumed the little flecks on them were speckles of broken icing, but as I went to throw the cookie bag away, a larva crawled out. The hundreds of flecks were moth eggs. I've been eating the cookies for three days. FML
Today, I found some cookies on my bed and got so excited that I kneed myself in my face. FML
Today, I grabbed a handful of crackers from the kitchen, only to find it crawling with bugs. Apparently, my brother had made the same discovery earlier, but put the box of crackers back in the cupboard anyway. FML
Today, I learned what live maggots in chocolate cake taste like. FML
Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML
Today, I decided to snack on some M&M's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my M&M's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the M&M off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an M&M. It was a dead beetle. FML
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Top comments
kionnalexus 0
First of all, you shouldn't have even considered eating them if they are a place where people stick their asses, second of all, its pretty obvious when something has legs. You're a dumb ass through and through.
MelanieP_fml 0
Oh dude, FYL. That's ****** up.
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Comments (120)
Monkeymolli 0
omg thats horrible I would have had a panic attack
chloe2114 4
try 9th mate, sorry but you fail... :)
ariestiger15 0
ewwww mega gross!!!!!!!!!!!! and seriously? why not get more FOOD and not " crumbs?"
TheBinksOhhhh13 0
YUMMY RIGHT ??? :)
delfino1604 24
Dumb ass with a capital D
CoolStoryBrahhx 0
Seriously.. Why would anyone eat crumbs off the couch? That's disgusting.
hbbs93 6
Damn were you that hungry?
tacotaco109 0
You must have been pretty hungry to go searching for crumbs..
sombi3 0
Oh shit. The first time I read it I thought it said crotch not couch..
zomgbies 17
ydi for being a slob