Today, I finished a dance competition. With competitions, it requires you to wear a lot of makeup like false eyelashes and red lipstick. I went into a Starbucks to get a coffee and a boy around 18 asked me, in all seriousness, what my rate is for one night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm a barista at Starbucks. When my crush walked in and asked how much his coffee would cost, I said a date. He said he'd rather pay for the coffee. FML
Today, date night with my boyfriend. I had my makeup done, fake lashes, etc. He was staring at me and I thought, "Oh, he loves how my eyes look" so I started flirting a lot, fluttering my lashes. We then took a pic and saw my lashes were falling, so I asked, ”Were they like that the whole night?” He replied, “Yeah, it looked weird.” FML
Today, I got all dressed up to go on a date with a guy. Upon getting to my house to pick me up, he told me he'd forgot to put on mascara, and asked if he could borrow some. FML
Today, I played a goth character in my friend's student film with goth clothes, lip ring, eyeliner, etc. We went into Starbucks at break and an elderly man came up to me and said "Your kind is the reason for all the bad stuff in this world" and then spat in my $5 drink. FML
Today, I tried to flirt with the cute barista by pretending to know a lot about coffee. I said, “I’ll take a macchiato, extra creamy.” He smiled and said, “That’s… not a thing.” I panicked and said, “Neither is my love life.” FML
Today, I went on an a date with a guy I met online. We were waiting in line at Starbucks when he turned to me and said, "Do you want anything?" Just before I was about to answer, he practically shoved in front of me and paid for himself. The cashier looked more horrified than I did. FML
Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML
Today, I went with my dad to Starbucks. There is this really cute guy who works there and he kept looking over at me, so I went over to say hi. He ended up asking if my dad was single. FML
Today, I had to dress like a diva for a drama performance and my friend said I looked like a hooker. Then someone said, “If hookers looked like that, they wouldn't get any money." FML
Today, I went to the park and people were crowded around some dancers. One of the dancers danced up to me, gave me a flower, and winked at me. I was very flattered, until the same dancer asked me to give the flower back after the dance so he could use it on the next show. FML
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Top comments
lordtumbles 9
Dancers dont make much money, I think you found your new calling.
Leki_0609 11
lol that's pretty funny. Would have loved to be there.
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Comments (135)
Acik91 26
I have the same problem every time I have a performance/competition - I feel I look like a hooker with all the scenic make-up. Then I leave home and I see that an average teenager puts more make-up on just for a regular night out, and that makes me feel better.
flfsu84 3
Most girls your age look like hookers anyways. Don't know why this one singled you out...
Zen_Mei 17
And people like you are douchebags
rattusrattus 19
That guy was seriously rude. One would assume that if a sex worker was in a coffee shop they were not currently working. It would be like going up to a fast-food employee in the supermarket and demanding "a big mac and fries please".
Glitter_taco_ 10
Did you slap him?
Steffi 26
How old are you OP?
SWC_Penguin 17
That's theater for you. Had you gone out in public as an actor with bloody gore makeup people would reacted to that too. Stage-looks and the real world don't really mix.
Lucia_Malpense 14
"No, I'm not a hooker... I just dance." "Oh, a dancer, huh? What club?"
Jharrist89 12
I bet it's cheaper than a cup of Starbucks coffee lol!
Needafarm 22
Should have quoted him the price of winning the dance competition along with what you paid for your costume and lessons throughout the years. Sounds like a good number.
deemarie13 14
Honey, cold cream and Kleenex would have helped avoid that.