Today, I figured out why I have been feeling so drowsy and lethargic for the past week. My daughter had been slipping sleeping pills into my coffee as payback for taking her phone away. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out why I can't sleep at night. My wife switched my sleep aid pills with energy pills. FML
Today, I found the cause of last night's crippling insomnia was the sleeping pill on the kitchen floor. FML
Today, my daughter has an ear infection and hasn’t slept more than 15 minutes a night for the last three days. Well tonight she was finally asleep, but I needed to take my own tablets. I had a violent coughing fit while choking on them, and woke her up. FML
Today, my adult daughter was hospitalized for severe fever, diarrhea, and fainting. The doctor couldn't find any cause other than sleep deprivation, because I started making her wake up at 7 am. I’ve never met anyone so ridiculously weak in my entire life. FML
Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed. She smiled at me and reassured me that it could be balanced out with sleeping pills. I'm raising a future drug addict. FML
Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML
Today, after a week of being tired and depressed, I realized my bottles for anti-depressants and muscle relaxants had gotten switched around. FML
Today, I checked the camera I set up to find out who has been stealing my prescription painkillers: my wife, my daughter, or my son. Turns out they all are. FML
Today, after being sick and not having coffee for a month, my body has invented a new way of processing caffeine: The tiredness and lethargy remains untouched, while the caffeine-jolt is converted directly into a fuzzy headache. FML
Today, I've been awake for nearly three days due to homework and my mom's wedding preparations, so I took some Adderall to keep me awake at school. I took too much, totally zoned out in class, became hopelessly fascinated by my own hand, and was accused of doing drugs. FML
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Top comments
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Time to put the hammer down. On her phone. Repeatedly!
LyricaSilvan 30
Your daughter sounds like she needs to learn some lessons about maturity. I suggest you find a way to deal with this before she steps up her game to something more harmful.
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Comments (129)
WardenWolf 26
This is where you drop the hammer: 1. Her current phone is permanently gone and she won't get a new one with full capabilities until she's at least 18. At best she'll get a TracPhone. 2. Her computer is gone and replaced with the most basic laptop you can possibly buy, and locked down like Fort Knox with security software. She won't be able to use it to communicate with anyone else. 3. She is completely grounded for the rest of the school year. She will have NO life outside of school. After that she will begin to get privileges back dependent on grades and good behavior.
TisButAScratch 10
On one hand, I'm tempted to praise your daughter for her ingenuity. On the other hand, I want you smack that bitch
Aspirax 13
I'm pretty sure that's illegal. Maybe she should get a really hard lesson.
interesting33 37
if you drove during that time, did she put you over the limit for driving? that would have endangered you and others. How old is she?
TheHcwalker 20
Put her in her place. Now.
dblogic 19
Not cool OP. Please treat this situation seriously & give a punishment that's way more than a slap on the wrist. And get your child some psychological help. Your daughter basically poisoned you for temporarily taking her phone away. Not only is your daughter being an immature, vindictive, conniving, spoiled brat...drugging/poisoning is psychopathic behavior. It is a fact that poisoning is the most popular method of choice for homicides committed by women. You are lucky she didn't slip you enough mickeys to cause serious harm and/or death. If she's willing to do this to her own mother, what's stopping her from acting on psychopathic behavior outside of the home? I just can't believe that this was a child's response for being punished, for having a phone taken away for a week?!?! WTF? I do think a conversation with the police is in order, you cannot let her get away with that. Time to stop that shit right now.
Caprica323 5
Depending on the dosage she could've killed you or caused you to fall asleep while driving and you could've killed someone else. Over a cell phone. If she needs a phone to keep in contact for emergency situations, cancel her smart phone and get her a simple trac-phone. This wasn't a joje, this was a serious consequence. May I suggest community outreach as well? Maybe some volunteer work can show her time away from her luxury items aren't that bad After all.
tjpr314 8
What she has been doing is totally unacceptable, stupid and dangerous especially over a phone! She needs to be punished and taught about the consequences of doing stupid and dangerous stuff like that. Behavior like that can potentially lead to other malicious behavior so she needs to get help with her coping mechanisms and behavior before she goes too far one day with you or someone else. Don't take that lightly and don't let her get away with that. She's the child, she doesn't run anything right now and she needs to learn some respect.
NeneJPhilly 8
That phone would be a done deal. Her door would be taken off its hinges. Her bed would be on the floor. She would have no extra curricular activities. She would go straight to school then straight home. She would not be able to use the computer for anything but homework. She wouldn't be able to watch TV. She wouldn't see friends except at school. She couldn't get phone calls on the house phone. She would be washes dishes, sweeping & vacuuming floors, mopping, dusting, washing clothes, cleaning toilets, the whole nine for months. The only thing she would be able to do for fun was read the Bible. The Old Testament. Especially the part about honoring your mother & father. Then I'd make her do community service. This is not okay & she needs to know it. Get her a therapist while you're at it because she clearly has issues if she's willing to poison her parent over a phone. Keep the lines of communication open & let her know you still love her but this sort of thing will not be tolerated. She could have really hurt you & it's a scary thought that she obviously didn't care. Good luck, OP.
xxsam143xx 12
I find this funny, I know it could be harmful but just the thought...I would have used laxatives, less dangerous... but I respect my mom enough to not do that