Today, I discovered my boyfriend of 5 months runs a website where... - FML

By Anonymous - 6/6/2009 16:01 - United States

Today, I discovered my boyfriend of 5 months runs a website where men can submit nude or semi nude pictures of their ex's for revenge. FML

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Fear factor

Does it taste good?

Rich people problems

By shorty - 21/4/2014 04:11 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, when I went to the shopping centre, the automatic door wouldn't open for me. I had to stand there and wait until someone else walked by to open it for me. I suffer from dwarfism and this is a daily occurrence. FML

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By Anonymous - 28/2/2017 22:00

Today, as I was at Starbucks writing a paper, a man came and sat next to me. He started staring at me, then I noticed his hands were down his pants. It was noticeable that he was masturbating, so I went to tell a worker. They just said, "He's a regular" and didn't do anything about it. FML

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By bwoolf96 - 10/9/2015 12:32

Today, in the early hours of the morning, I woke up in sleep paralysis, hallucinating the sight of children hanging from the ceiling. Now I'm scared to sleep. FML

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By fuck you, boss - 21/12/2013 00:30 - United States

Today, my boss scolded me for being too friendly to our customers and told me to back off and let them do their thing. Less than an hour after doing as he said, he scolded me again, this time for slacking off and not asking them if they needed help finding stuff. There goes my bonus. FML

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By Anonymous - 22/12/2009 01:30 - Canada

Today, I got fed up with the amount of hair on my feet, so I went to get my foot hair waxed off. When I removed my socks, the waxer laughed the amount of foot hair. I'm a 18 year old female and it appears I have feet that were last seen on Big Foot. FML

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By mariah_1_11 - 6/3/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I was supposed to go on a date with a guy I really like. My friends convinced me that he was going to stand me up and that I should just stay home to avoid being hurt. He showed up; I didn't. My friends laughed at my gullible nature. FML

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By Anonymous - 20/3/2016 02:05 - United States

Today, I told my husband that when I get my birth control taken out later this year, I would like to take a break from it for a while. He just said, "Condoms are too expensive and I don't want to waste $2 every time we do it." FML

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By Sharon - 10/12/2016 13:51 - United Kingdom - Heckmondwike

Today, my own dog bit me quite severely when I was in the middle of teaching a dog obedience class. Everyone had a good laugh at me and in the past few hours 4 of them have contacted me to let me know they won't be attending future lessons and that they'd like to get their money back. FML

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By uninvited - 4/2/2016 15:16 - United States - Boston

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

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By Anonymous - 26/5/2016 16:58 - Belgium - De Pinte

Today, my co-workers decided in our meeting with my boss that everything is my fault. When asked for examples, they couldn't come up with any. Now they are mad at me, because I'm apparently good at my job. FML

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By Anonymous - 15/8/2011 00:25 - United States

Today, while flicking my bean, I was thinking about my boyfriend who moved to California last week. Before I came, I had to stop because I started crying. FML

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By Anonymous - 14/3/2012 19:31 - United States

Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML

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By Anonymous - 2/9/2017 13:00

Today, changing the garbage in the bathroom at work resulted in a hospital visit after an incorrectly disposed used needle scraped into my thigh. FML

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By sleepy - 3/1/2011 02:58 - Norway

Today, after a two week holiday, I'm returning to work exhausted. I had nightmares about work every single night. FML

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By Anonymous - 17/11/2010 08:03 - United States

Today, I confessed to my best friend that I love him and always have. He whispered to himself, "Why do the fat chicks always want me?" FML

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By KnowledgableEx - 10/11/2016 12:42 - United States - Baltimore

Today, my ex-girlfriend from several years ago texted me. We were having a pleasant conversation until she asked me to give advice. Apparently, her current boyfriend is incapable of talking dirty, fingering, and other sexual aspects. She asked me to give him advice and pointers. FML

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By d.stack - 12/8/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, I ran sound for my ex's wedding rehearsal since I was the only sound tech in town. Her dad was late for the rehearsal, so the pastor had me to walk her down the aisle. FML

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By IdiotNursingStudent - 22/9/2014 02:12 - United States - Belton

Today, I was reviewing for a major nursing school exam I have this week. I panicked because none of the material seemed familiar, and figured that I must've missed something during class and now had to catch up. After 4 hours, I finally realized that I'd been studying from the wrong textbook. FML

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By toothache - 14/5/2013 12:03 - United States - Morton Grove

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

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By Anonymous - 28/12/2013 05:10 - United States - Novi

Today, after being married for 20 years, I found out that my wife has accounts on multiple dating sites, "just in case." FML

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By Anonymous - 24/12/2010 05:02 - Australia

Today, I helped out with makeup at my daughter's high school play. As one girl walked past, I told her that she'd smudged pink lipstick all up the side of her face. Turns out it was a birthmark. She cried in the dressing room for half an hour. FML

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By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 04:58 - United States

Today, I woke up and realized I have experienced my first "nocturnal emission". I am a 24 year old male who has been married for 3 months. Guess who isn't getting any. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/8/2018 03:30

Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML

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By Anonymous - 13/11/2015 15:51 - Netherlands - Sevenum

Today, I opened up to my best friend about my depression. Her response: "If you're so depressed, why don't you just kill yourself?" FML

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By gonesofast - 9/10/2014 17:53 - United States - Quincy

Today, as I was about to leave home for my first sweet taste of freedom at my new apartment, my car died. I'm stuck here for at least the weekend and can look forward to my mom driving me to work. Freedom. FML

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By Sad_Happy_Gorl - 15/12/2018 23:00 - United States - University Center

Today, I found out my boyfriend has to picture someone else when we have sex. The most recent: my roommate. FML

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By CantBlink - 16/7/2012 18:25 - United States - Jersey City

Today, I woke up with a pimple on my eyelid. Not only is it impossible to cover up with makeup, I can't pop it either. Now I'll be spending the rest of the day trying not to blink. FML

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By Anonymous - 24/2/2012 02:24 - United States

Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML

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By spermbankonlegs - 16/3/2012 02:21 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

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By Anonymous - 7/6/2016 19:27 - United States - Charlottesville

Today, my coworker cornered me in the office bathroom and insisted that, because she's been watching me, I use the bathroom too quickly and must not be washing my hands, and that I have to wash them from now on. FML

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By awkwardbf - 9/9/2009 01:26 - United States

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

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By so unsexy - 4/8/2016 21:32 - United States - Seattle

Today, I thought I'd spice things up by kissing my husband on the lips and then working my way down. But about halfway, I got some of his chest hairs lodged in my throat and started gagging. To avoid ruining the mood, I kept going, silently gagging, until we finished. I swallowed the hair. FML

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By mah - 16/1/2010 02:25 - United States

Today, while getting gas, a hottie pulled-up to the pump next to me. I finished filling my tank and started to drive away. As I was checking her out and paying no attention to my driving, I ended up taking the front bumper off her car with my truck. FML

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By Anonymous - 26/4/2011 07:49 - United States

Today, I learned the only job that actually wants me is as a peanut butter factory worker. I've been unemployed for 9 months. I'm also allergic to nuts. FML

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By daughter - 18/9/2012 04:25 - Sweden - V?rg?rda

Today, I found out that, for over three years, my boyfriend has solely been dating me to get closer to my mom. Apparently, "she's a total MILF." FML

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By kingwalrus - 12/6/2010 18:55 - United Kingdom

Today, my siblings overpowered me and duct taped me to a chair. Helpless, I had to wait until my dad got home so he could help me. Instead, the first thing he did was reach for his camera to take a picture. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/6/2014 17:26 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

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By carrottop - 7/1/2011 12:12 - Australia

Today, I finally found out why my fish were dying in their tank. My younger sister had been spraying detergent in there because she wanted "to make the fish smell like lemons". FML

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By hwood - 9/9/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, my Grandmother was sent to the ER. My family blamed it on her being allergic to my cats, making me feel guilty. She just called me to tell me the test results informed her that she is actually allergic to the carrot cake they got her. I gave my cats away 15 minutes ago to a little girl. FML

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By And I'm still single - 24/3/2013 08:59 - United States - Mission Viejo

Today, I found out that my picture from a dating profile was so "hilarious" that people have been posting it on Instagram with mean captions. FML

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Top comments

By DollyMolly | 0

#276529 - Saturday 6 June 2009 22:56

Never break up with him.

By JennyyBennyy | 0

#276554 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:01

this could be illegal.

Comments

By DollyMolly | 0

#276529 - Saturday 6 June 2009 22:56

Never break up with him.

Reply

AbscenceOfLuck | 0

#873051 - Friday 19 February 2010 20:30

What did you say the website was called? lol

Reply

nosedive1994 | 0

#980700 - Saturday 17 April 2010 1:39

probably not a good idea to break up with him...

Reply

Itzy02 | 0

#1007473 - Wednesday 26 May 2010 5:15

lol. agreed.

Reply

quackbuzzwoof | 0

#1350483 - Saturday 4 September 2010 15:42

that's illegal so once you break up with him you can just tell the cops and he'll be fucked.

Reply

itaimumwiro | 8

#2633011 - Monday 6 June 2011 22:49

fuc u

Reply

ArentICute | 0

#2875505 - Tuesday 12 July 2011 17:54

Or, why don't you act all crazy until HE breaks up with YOU. That way he won't need revenge.

Reply

xXxXxMasonxXxXx | 7

#2904716 - Saturday 16 July 2011 8:23

he'd prolly still take revenge for her acting crazy...

Reply

nightslayer | 6

#4265352 - Friday 6 April 2012 7:08

Sounds like hunter moore kinda lol

Reply

guyfawke | 5

#4645043 - Tuesday 3 July 2012 7:51

which one of those kind of sites is it? I think there are a few

Reply

KtKD54 | 2

#4674375 - Wednesday 11 July 2012 2:02

Well, u know, if no one shared nude pictures, then this wouldnt be a problem

Reply

sawuuhcat | 11

#5087953 - Saturday 27 October 2012 17:35

I totally agree KtKD54; just don't send nudes!

Reply

CoGhostRider | 31

#5611049 - Saturday 3 August 2013 9:22

I don't think it works like that lol

By ryan__h | 1

#276532 - Saturday 6 June 2009 22:57

haha
lol #1

By happygoluckyhh | 0

#276541 - Saturday 6 June 2009 22:59

What website?
NUBMER 2!! XD

By cobra946 | 0

#276548 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:00

lol @ #1

By rejectedbeauty | 0

#276549 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:00

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Reply

KrazyKatz3 | 26

#7521944 - Friday 4 August 2017 18:57

That's illegal...

By U_idiot | 1

#276551 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:00

LOL! Don't let him get a hold of any pictures of you haha.

By JennyyBennyy | 0

#276554 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:01

this could be illegal.

By Purane2forever | 0

#276555 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:01

Im on one of those.. but i put my self because i have a fat who know what.... wink wink ladies

Reply

babycourt11 | 0

#971664 - Wednesday 31 March 2010 5:43

hey:)

Reply

dezzybaby | 0

#2116799 - Thursday 24 February 2011 3:37

nobody cares and if youre advertising then its not true (:

By ryanr21 | 0

#276557 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:01

Hes a mover and a shaker! thats not a bad idea! haha

By moonmask | 0

#276564 - Saturday 6 June 2009 23:03

I agree w/ #8, that's violation of privacy and probably illegal.

Reply

alishous | 8

#4106188 - Wednesday 29 February 2012 18:01

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Reply

MaydayParadexx | 18

#6266372 - Saturday 18 April 2015 20:22

#302, no it's not. You cannot share nude pictures of someone without their consent. And for all we know, the girls on the site could be under 18.