By adirom - United States - San Francisco
Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML
adirom tells us more :
Thanks for all your support (or lack there of in some cases) for those of you wondering why I told them over text, my friends and I are very close and have a group message with just the 4 of us, the topic came up and I took the opportunity. I have social anxiety, and decided for the sake of my sanity that would work best. And after my one friend replied "k" there were multiple texts saying they supported me and didn't think of me any differently (which was my worry). So it all turned out for the best! To all of y'all who think being bisexual isn't a big deal, coming out regardless is a big deal. So please try and open your mind to how difficult it is to stray from social norms!
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Top comments
By  briang959  |  46

Maybe they thought you were hitting on them.

  cjwayy  |  22

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

  ZombieSazza  |  34

Just because you like both genders and you're telling your friends this, doesn't mean you're hitting on them. Genuinely one of the worst things about telling someone that you're bi, they assume that you're attracted to them and are hitting on them.

Please, don't flatter yourselves.

  2i1337i2iscore  |  13

#52 people are rejected by others for infinite number of unfair reasons. The social norm is not heterosexuality anymore. Publicly making your sexuality a big deal to others is the opposite of having people accept who you are- and focusing on accepting one part about you. That is the same as saying your sexuality is what defines you. While coming out to yourself can be a milestone in development, the relevance to being accepted by others, in a public way, is purely for personal gain. He sent a text, extremely impersonal, to his friends all at once- not talking to them individually. Most people in this generation do not care- which is a passive acceptance of all sexuality as normal.

  subgub2222  |  16

Ya your right I'm sure the people who come out to their family's and get kicked out of rejected by their friends don't think it's "cool". You have no idea what those people have to deal with of how fucking scary it is to come out, so fuck off

By  xLIGHTS_fml  |  23

Don't let it get to you OP. Unless they were all responding immediately before you came out, I wouldn't worry too much. If they are your real friends they will accept you for who you are. You're still the same person.

  fortune789  |  17

#4, That's kind of what I was thinking. I'm today's times, I doubt anyone really cares. One of my closest friends came out gay last year because her sister let it slip. She was terrified it would be a big ordeal, but her parents just kind of said, "that's great, we still love you just as much." This situation was probably similar.

  Helpfulman  |  17

This is actually probably one of the best things that could've happened in this situation. It means that OP's friends are cool with it and it changes nothing about their current relationship.

  sturschaedel  |  27

This. If they would have gushed out stuff like "OMG, really, are you sure, I can't believe it!" and THEN fallen silent, that would have been bad. This non-response probably just means that they aren't rattled by it.

  Tthug  |  34

It's just unnecessarily awkward in a group. Definitely not a solid play. Furthermore I hate group messaging because then you get ALL the messages, even if you only know 2-3 people on the list.

  Blippety  |  23

Perhaps they didn't reply because just don't think it's a big deal? Which is actually really good thing, since it means it doesn't phase them and they're completely cool with it.

  ohSNAPyall  |  26

I had a friend who came out as bi to me, when almost no one else knew. He was so shaken up about what he had to say that I thought he was going to say he was suicidal. I was relieved when he finally told me.

His other friends and family know now, and he seems less anxious in general. I'm glad for him.

By  obnum  |  19

We all freak out over things that are really big in our minds. To your friend, you coming out wasn't much of a big deal, you're still their friend and that's that.

At least, that's how I see it