By adirom - 21/10/2014 02:25 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 636
You deserved it 9 552

adirom tells us more.

Thanks for all your support (or lack there of in some cases) for those of you wondering why I told them over text, my friends and I are very close and have a group message with just the 4 of us, the topic came up and I took the opportunity. I have social anxiety, and decided for the sake of my sanity that would work best. And after my one friend replied "k" there were multiple texts saying they supported me and didn't think of me any differently (which was my worry). So it all turned out for the best! To all of y'all who think being bisexual isn't a big deal, coming out regardless is a big deal. So please try and open your mind to how difficult it is to stray from social norms!

Top comments

Their silence probably means they're "k" with it. Just as long as you're happy with whom you are.

Gay is the new norm. It's not even cool to come out as gay anymore. The real edgy people are coming out as ebola victims.


Maybe they thought you were hitting on them.

how come noone says anything when I admitted I was straight. equality ppl!!

cjwayy 22

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Gay is the new norm. It's not even cool to come out as gay anymore. The real edgy people are coming out as ebola victims.

Why is 52 getting downvoted? It's true, in the sense that straight people don't have to worry about getting rejected by friends and family because of their sexuality

cdawg69 10

Just because you like both genders and you're telling your friends this, doesn't mean you're hitting on them. Genuinely one of the worst things about telling someone that you're bi, they assume that you're attracted to them and are hitting on them. Please, don't flatter yourselves.

#52 people are rejected by others for infinite number of unfair reasons. The social norm is not heterosexuality anymore. Publicly making your sexuality a big deal to others is the opposite of having people accept who you are- and focusing on accepting one part about you. That is the same as saying your sexuality is what defines you. While coming out to yourself can be a milestone in development, the relevance to being accepted by others, in a public way, is purely for personal gain. He sent a text, extremely impersonal, to his friends all at once- not talking to them individually. Most people in this generation do not care- which is a passive acceptance of all sexuality as normal.

subgub2222 16

Ya your right I'm sure the people who come out to their family's and get kicked out of rejected by their friends don't think it's "cool". You have no idea what those people have to deal with of how ******* scary it is to come out, so **** off

why the hell does this have so many negative votes? it's true, and it's what I and many others are fighting against.

Don't let it get to you OP. Unless they were all responding immediately before you came out, I wouldn't worry too much. If they are your real friends they will accept you for who you are. You're still the same person.

#4, That's kind of what I was thinking. I'm today's times, I doubt anyone really cares. One of my closest friends came out gay last year because her sister let it slip. She was terrified it would be a big ordeal, but her parents just kind of said, "that's great, we still love you just as much." This situation was probably similar.

Actually, it seems to me like they simply just don't give a damn either way. Either that or they already had their reasons to suspect.

Their silence probably means they're "k" with it. Just as long as you're happy with whom you are.

This is actually probably one of the best things that could've happened in this situation. It means that OP's friends are cool with it and it changes nothing about their current relationship.

Who has been responsible for the recruitment of Grammar Nazis lately? Seems like their quality is dropping.

This. If they would have gushed out stuff like "OMG, really, are you sure, I can't believe it!" and THEN fallen silent, that would have been bad. This non-response probably just means that they aren't rattled by it.

Not rattled and/or didn't want to be the first one to respond if someone had texted this as a "prank."

SaltyLurker 10

Sometimes it's "who!" - Monica from F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Some people just can't deal with things like that. You should've told them in person, that would at have given you a straight answer.

Agreed. Especially in a group message it's difficult to be the first one to reply.

It's just unnecessarily awkward in a group. Definitely not a solid play. Furthermore I hate group messaging because then you get ALL the messages, even if you only know 2-3 people on the list.

or, they didn't reply because they already new n it wasnt reply worthy?

atav 17

Haha way to slip the pun in there.

Perhaps they didn't reply because just don't think it's a big deal? Which is actually really good thing, since it means it doesn't phase them and they're completely cool with it.

llamarrama01 21

Probably means they don't think it's a big deal. When my friend came out to me I really didn't think much of it.

... your friend Cas, by any chance? ;)

I had a friend who came out as bi to me, when almost no one else knew. He was so shaken up about what he had to say that I thought he was going to say he was suicidal. I was relieved when he finally told me. His other friends and family know now, and he seems less anxious in general. I'm glad for him.

We all freak out over things that are really big in our minds. To your friend, you coming out wasn't much of a big deal, you're still their friend and that's that. At least, that's how I see it

martin8337 35

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

What does it even mean, with that terrible syntax? Is Yoda on meth?

llamarrama01 21

sounds like you just want the attention