Today, I bit into my egg sandwich, and when I looked back into it, there were 5 long, gray, hairs leading from the sandwich into my mouth. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bit into a cereal bar and thought the inside was oddly damp. I took a look at it and saw a maggot worm wriggling around. Its friend was in my mouth. FML
Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML
Today, I was running late for work, so I grabbed a cheap sandwich from a gas station. As I rushed to take a bite, I bit into something unexpectedly hard. I thought it was a tough bit of bacon, or some sort of nut, but realized it was a small plastic fork that had been helpfully hidden inside my sandwich. I'd already swallowed half of it. FML
Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML
Today, I was eating an onion bagel and bit down on something hard. At first I thought was a really hard piece of onion. The "onion" turned out to be a tooth, and it wasn't one of mine. FML
Today, while eating a sandwich, I saw a worm. Knowing that my friend always tries to scare me with fake worms and insects, I bit it to show her I knew it was fake. It was real. FML
Today, I went out to lunch on my break. When I got back to work, I noticed I had something in my teeth. After trying to get it out with my tongue, I finally went to my car for some floss. I ended up pulling a 4 inch pube out of my back teeth. It certainly wasn't mine. FML
Today, I found a bone in my sandwich. It was a veggie burger. FML
Today, while at a restaurant, I watched in horror as my daughter picked a hair out of her food and continued eating it. FML
Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML
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Top comments
Rainbowsareshiny 0
ew. ew. ew. ew. well that's just gross. maybe you should try making your own food now? haha i can't even think of another response but...ew.
TC_fml 0
Yikes. Are you sure they were chicken eggs? :-P Hopefull it wasn't a crab salad one... Ewwww
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Comments (46)
resawins 0
grosssssssss!!!!!!!
inktree 0
Thanks...I'm trying not to eat anything this morning.
kyrspark 0
someones life would have ended in the following 15 minutes.
caretoshare 0
GRROOOSSS! I have a phobia about hairs in my mouth and stuff. I already have shivers up my spine just thinking about your sandwich! :O LOL.
writerajere 0
I threw up a little...
mmiikkee 0
In all seriousness... Was it good?
redfred5 0
May have been pubes
azeem 0
To be fair, I'm an adult, and I still adore child's toys. Honestly, they remembered and cared about your birthday and tried to get you something you'd like. You have much to be happy for. Don't be so greedy and materialistic that you'd complain about a gift given with the best intentions. There are many in the world who are far less fortunate.
TheRealEllieSan 9
?
mikew85 0
That's sick. I wouldn't eat at the Furry Egg Cafe ever again.
fobchick 0
#34 WTF are you talking about?....Werido