Today, I accidentally farted at a board meeting. My boss thought it came from the guy sitting next to me and gave him hell for being a pig. I was too mortified to say anything, even when the guy blamed it on me, which caused my boss to rage at him for lying and then to kick him out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML
Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work, trying to keep my composure. I quietly shifted in my chair and accidentally let out a fart. It echoed in the conference room, and everyone stared at me in stunned silence. My boss sarcastically said, “Well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” FML
Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML
Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML
Today, I was going over some paperwork with my back to my office door. As I turn around, my boss enters and says my name loudly. I was startled so bad that I jumped, yelped, and a high-pitched fart snuck out. Everyone in the office now gives prior notice before dropping by the "fart guy's" office. FML
Today, I held in an explosive fart during a co-worker's rant and waited a few seconds after he left the room to release the Kraken. Forgetting something, he returned mid-fart. Before either of us could say anything, our boss came into the room. FML
Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
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Top comments
Emma1562 35
You honestly should've said something, it sucks that that poor guy had to deal with that
rozalyn77 15
asshole
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Comments (111)
Steve_Dudley_UK 10
Women in the workplace eh. If had been all guys they would have all joked about it. Because boss thought guy had farted next to a woman he has a go at the poor guy. Woman because she is a woman can't simply tell truth to room of men she did something they all do every day. Innocent guy tells truth that he is innocent, gets kicked out of meeting, no more promotion or pay rise for him. Woman who made noise and then lied by then being silent is victim in bosses eyes and will get better pay rise or promotion in future. All this over female not being one of the guys and saying 'twas me boss. was better out than in".
mishwarner 14
Hahaha I would have done the same unless I was really close w the boss and/or the other guy
Talonshere 14
Well that stinks :/ *pun intended*
interesting33 37
OP there is still time to rescue this. I think the best thing to do is to have a quiet word with your boss and explain you farted accidentally and it won't happen again and that it wasn't your co-worker's fault. I mean to be honest, it is not okay to let the co-worker take the blame but at the same time to be put on the spot like that in such a situation is really hard to deal with and I may well have not said anything either. We forget the social pressures and just how strong they really are in such a situation, Ultimately I think this is your boss' fault for being such a jerk. I mean putting someone on the spot for something they can't help it isn't that much of a wonder you didn't want to speak up. They should be more professional. There is no excuse for them shouting.
Sometime 6
I kinda feel that the guy sitting next to you will post an FML soon saying "Today, this conplete bitch of a coworker farted and I got the blame for it. FML"
Snaxia 12
I'm more concerned that your boss got angry about a natural human occurrence.
confused_wandere 26
I don't understand why this has so many FYLs. This is a complete YDI if ever there was one!
dragoongirl90 34
You do not belong in Gryffindor, you cowardly, self-serving Slytherin.
bapbap_fml 15
That's a real dick move on the bosses part. An involuntary bodily function is not a reason to get so worked up. If he had just waited a few minutes it would have all blown over.
iamvanillabear 11
Everyone knows girls don't fart...