By Nofriends - 09/07/2012 11:44 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, for my birthday, my family offered to take one of my friends to the movies with me. I had to pay a random person in my class to pose as a friend of mine, so that I wouldn't look pathetic in front of my parents. She forgot my name three times. They didn't buy it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 19 416
You deserved it 25 144

Same thing different taste


If you have to pay someone to act as a friend, you're not doing something right

I find it very very hard to believe that someone could not have even one single friend. I've never met anybody in the course of my life who didn't even have one person who they could call a friend.

You get first comment and THIS is what you do with it?! What is this world coming to.

People talk about first comment like it's a privilege handed down from heaven above. I agree they should either be funny or well thought out, but if it isn't someone saying "First!!!!!1!1!" or something equally stupid, then just move on. It's just one comment out of the potential 150+ under an FML.

34-Someone is getting civil up in here. It was a joke. A sploof. A laugh. A giggle. A hehe-moment. Just like Obama saying he is American. Edit: Just so you know, I thumbs'd your comment, it was helpful to explain what I meant in my first post.

36-Fair enough. But my point still stands. I wasn't angry, just making a statement.

American by ethnicity and ****** stupid by presidential office.

theslimshadylp 6

Yah I agree. Be confident and make some friends

#26 I don't have any friends (everyone tends to avoid me for some reason o_O)

A simple hey wuts up or yo gets the job done

PenguinSwag47 0

Should've just politely rejected the offer to bring a friend instead of showing your parents how desperate you really are.

OP: just talk to people you see every day. Listen to what they say to you and don't be a jerk to them--you'll have friends in no time!

26- actually this girl in my elementary school (well middle school) didn't have any friends. She would stay inside all the time helping teachers during recess. It's only when we got to high school that she finally made a friend.

I've met one person without a single friend but only because he's an asshole and doesn't talk to anyone without insulting them

JustDerpin 11

61, your profile says you're shy. I don't think people are avoiding you.

91- the teachers were her friends. ((Not in an inappropriate way!!))

She might be anti-social. Either way, that really sucks that you don't have friends, OP. If theres someone that is willing to talk to you, try to become their friend! But paying people to be your friend is truly pathetic.

For years, I was *that* guy. Never had so much as an acquaintance in primary school. My social life is more or less normal now that I'm in high school, though I don't keep in touch with my friends simply because I live in Grand Prairie [area code 214] and most of my friends live in Arlington/Fort Worth [area code 817]. [My Long Distance plan is a killer. Don't ask why.] -R

I agree. There's no way somebody could have zero friends unless they were actually trying to not have friends.

yeanoshit 7

Back to the Big Bang Theory with you OP! Big Bang Theory fans, please don't hurt me!

Haha that sucks for you maybe you could have said you just wanted to spend your birthday with your parents.

One does not simply.... O wait, yes one does simply just make friends. Get out there OP!

BVBarmyForever 0

17- what the hell is that supposed to mean?!

perdix 29

Do you really want to be friends with someone who can't get someone else to see a free movie with them? The parents would have sprung for popcorn, snacks and drinks, so you could sit one seat away from the loser OP (using the seat between you to lay out your feast.) I hope you reconsider your offer.

One of Perdix's comments has been buried? A sure sign of the apocalypse.

perdix 29

#3 and #27, why don't you really reach out to the OP and befriend her? Otherwise, I think you are a couple of fakes who want to appear nice and sympathetic in front of the FML crowd. I'll bet the OP is a tedious bore, or a foul-tempered harpy. Let me know what you find out after you contact her. If you don't, you both ought to STFU.

Swiftie 0

Erm, I don't think they were being serious.

p3mguin 7

Thank you perdix, you are my hero. People are hypocrites on this website

I must agree with Perdix on this one. I've had friendless periods in my life but I would never stoop to paying a friend-*****. If I absolutely HAD to pay someone for company it would be a real *****! None of this pansy-assed "Wiw you pweeze be my fwend" crap. OP should have hired a male model gigolo and said it was her boyfriend, skipped the movie and gotten laid! Now THAT would be a great birthday, regardless of what her parents think.

82 - "Friend" isn't a verb. However, "befriend" is. Sorry, Facebook's recent effect on everything I witness lately just pisses me off. I WILL admit I have it pretty good if that's my biggest concern for the day, though.

Who cares if there fakes or not! It is just a FML. You need to calm down.

KiddNYC1O 20

This thread is pretty pathetic.

DontClickOnMe 28

I hope you got your money back then. How hard is it to remember someone's name? Happy Birthday, OP!

theninja1800 11

What happens if someone clicks on you?

DontClickOnMe 28

Oh, you don't wanna know. But if you do, then just click on me and find out. I dare you. >:D *insert evil laugh here*

theninja1800 11

I think I'll pass on that hahaha

I really wanna click on you, but I really don't..

perdix 29

I hope you stiffed your employee on the tip. That's shitty service!

Yeah no kidding. Whoever you hired really sucked. I hope you didn't lose much money on the OP.

unknown_user5566 26

OP's "employee" probably isn't used to being required to remember names outside of "Big Daddy" and "Papi". ;)

jazziness 12

I hope you got your money back.

Try to make friends, and I hope you got your money; that girl is pretty dumb to be honest

If you actually paid someone to be your friend then you deserve it. That's pretty damn pathetic OP. Try being social, it's FREE!

Redox127 7

Time for a Project X party.

rcgirl2 11

Somebody say," Hey! We want some pussay!" *repeats in Costa's voice*

CessOMG 3

You can never buy a friend, OP. Just go tell your parents and make some real friends! :) Oh, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!