Today, at work I got an urgent message from my boyfriend that there was an emergency and I should come home immediately. I took my last personal day of the month and drove the half-hour home. The emergency? The cat had vomited on the comforter. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat vomited. Covered it up with a bowl so you can clean it when you come home." FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML
Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML
Today, I was woken up by my cat, who normally doesn't bother me in the morning, meowing desperately and trying to get me to wake up. Fearing that something was very wrong, I jumped out of bed. He gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I followed him all the way to the kitchen, where he proceeded to puke. FML
Today, I was going to be sick, so I ran to the bathroom. When I got there, I fainted, and fell back against the wall. When I came around, I immediately vomited all down my body, in my hair, and all over the floor. My cat judged me. FML
Today, I had a horrible day at work, came home early and burst into tears as soon as I was in the door. I curled up on the sofa, still bawling, and my cat came over and jumped up for a cuddle. I gave her a hug and she threw up down my back. FML
Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML
Today, I woke up to my husband slowly pulling my blanket off me. I thought he was being romantic until I realized it was because the cat had puked all over me while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I noticed my cat was about to vomit on the rug and yelled at her to move. She spooked and managed to throw up while running. I still had to clean up the rug. FML
Today, I got home after a spending a week recovery from surgery. My neighbour had been feeding my cat whilst I was away. Exhausted, I went straight to my bedroom where I soon discovered that my cat had shat on my pillows, duvet, and pyjamas. FML
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Top comments
Llama_Face89 34
Make the pansy get you a drink, then clean it up.
SteveTheJanitor 6
Tell him to man up and clean it up himself.
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Comments (98)
embr 0
so since it was ur last day does this happen often?
TylerOMFG 7
Will you make him a sammich? That is the real emergency.
NoNotTheFace 8
Do you know how hard it is to remove cat vomit from ANYTHING?? A sick cat puked on me once and an old lady kept following me on the street because she smelt death. So basically I smelt like a funeral.
stacianichole 2
Step one: paper towel, clean vomit, throw away or flush. Step two: put comforter in washing machine. Consequently, it will also need to be dried. Oh, I guess step 1 would actually be SUCK IT UP.
hannahcorrine 0
I'd be mad too...
jerico616 14
Forgive the boyfriend, kill the cat.
rattusrattus 19
Nah, the cat's innocent in the boyfriend's tosswankery. I suggest caber-tossing the boyfriend.
FMLISFUNNY13 5
Ha cats arent the best get a dog
Boothroid 0
you deserve it because there are things called telephones you over reacted also should've talked to him
Grimmerie 31
wait, you're mad cause he called you home to clean up puke? you can't force him to do it! he might get it on his hands or his clothes. ew.
Mirorbo 27
Some darlings REALLY need to be reminded what actually classifies as an emergency...
MissRoxiie 12
Yes but she didn't know until she got home, if she knew what it was she would have probably told him to do it himself.
boredfishing 0
I hate doing it myself :(
stevenmx86 8
Ydi, this all could have been solved by "What's wrong?"
xMeganMayhem 6
.
xMeganMayhem 6
Taking a day off and having a day off on your work schedule are two completely different things. Get a job and maybe you'd understand. Edit: This is actually in reply to 28. For some reason, my comment keeps ending up here.
Ozma_fml 0
I'm curious about these "personal days"... You get more than one a *month*?? Do you work in a job that has no weekends/no other days off or what??
NurseHolly 3
I was thinking that too!