Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML
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By
dancer4moon
| 8
She's rude!
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TheZee
| 12
Really? I actually find the mom quite nice for saying that.
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bananagrams
| 9
My mom did that except I'm not allergic to bananas, and she told me to do something else with it...
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Maverick52
| 13
Am I the only one curious as to what 75's mom told them to do?
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Cavebone
| 5
I don't know... maybe she's rude, or maybe she's just trying to plantain a seed in your head...
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Maverick52
| 13
Bad! Bad Cavebone!! Now go to your room and think of this atrocity of a pun you just did!
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MarkEternal02
| 19
... Mother knows best? (Pure sarcasm intended!)
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stinewd
| 9
Listen to "mother knows best" from tangled. But I'm drunk as hell, what do I know! Happy new year
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summy15423
| 12
That really is rude, but at least your mom didn't shove it down your throat or something. I would have taken the banana to scare her and then have thrown it at her face.
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mariazzz
| 5
Am I the only one here that finds this post hilarious!
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hiitisbrooke
| 26
111- Listen to your mumsy (:
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sens3sfailing
| 24
81-their mother told them to go fuck themselves -.- was it really that hard for you to get?
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rangermedic77
| 5
Well that escalated quickly
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Pewppew
| 1
The only comment that actually used any wit.
By
breakingbad_fml
| 27
At least she didn't try and kill you herself. With that being said: Your mom is rude.
***Didn't see that first comment there, sorry.
***Didn't see that first comment there, sorry.
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BlowinChronic
| 18
If she did kill her with the banana then we wouldn't have to worry about it happening ever again because the liberals would just campaign against our rights to have bananas.
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insertnameherr
| 11
OP should throw it right back saying "Go fuck yourself!"
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rocketiquette
| 20
... With the banana
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DKParth13
| 5
Is it me or there are no I agrees or ydi?
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Hiimhaileypotter
| 52
#88 - I'd only suggest her telling her mother to go fuck herself if she either A) isn't afraid of being grounded, or B) is too old to be grounded. :P
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Zephianaxo
| 7
135- I'm on my iphone and its at 0/0 for me as well. Been happening to quite a few posts on my phone.
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SillyGirl4602
| 23
I agree. It doesn't matter how mad a mother gets at their child. They should NEVER tell him/her to go like himself/herself.
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Brett41
| 10
I really dont care for bananas. not so much the taste of them as it is the texture that gets to me. and the fact that its dick-shaped.. that too.
By
lilhellian
| 26
Hmm a banana, maybe she was hinting at something..
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ittsdann
| 6
I think it was pretty obvious when she said here go kill yourself.
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lilhellian
| 26
I mean why the banana. There are other fruit.. Subliminal messaging anyone?
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ittsdann
| 6
Then she should of said "go fuck yourself and die"
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lilhellian
| 26
But that's not very lady-like!
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docscientist
| 9
I'm sure youre reading too much into it.
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1awliet
| 8
Maybe OP will be the first person to actually slip on a banana peel.
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rebecamp494
| 5
Why would her mother insinuate her to fuck herself? Someone needs to get their mind out of the gutter.. -.-
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lilhellian
| 26
Life is not nearly as much fun as it is with it in! :)
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poccocurantes
| 7
I think LH is trying to hit on the Freudian significance of the banana imagery. Why did OPs mom choose a fruit overwhelmingly phallic as opposed to an apple which clearly has both biblical and mythological significance. Or a star fruit that when viewed end on resembles an asshole.
Too much?
Too much?
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supportcommand
| 17
Maybe she threw a banana because that's all that was there. It says nothing about her picking a banana over any other fruit.
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lilhellian
| 26
Exactly #74, some people are just nutters
By
the_illuminated
| 4
Banana, gun, doesn't matter. They're both phallic tools of unimaginable destruction.
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Wishez
| 12
I think OP needs to invest in a new mother.
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Miss_Attitude96
| 24
"Batman, what comes out of the end of a gun?"
"Injustice!"
What comes out of the end of a banana?
POTASSIUM!
"Injustice!"
What comes out of the end of a banana?
POTASSIUM!
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LupeTabasco
| 5
BAN BANANAS!!!
By
shaebayla
| 6
I'm so sorry you have such a bitch for a mother.
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SirCharles83
| 13
That makes op a son of a bitch. Or daughter I suppose.
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MidnaLink
| 32
Reminds me of a far earlier FML
By
thebeautybleeds
| 17
Well. Take the banana and kill her with it?
By
StEpHiE1226
| 12
Meanie mommy!
By
LupusDie
| 9
Fake eating it and fake your death.
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lilhellian
| 26
Something tells me if she sticks it in her mouth she will have a real allergic reaction..
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llamafish
| 25
That's why she fakes eating it instead. I suspect it would have to be a bit less direct than simply sticking the banana into
her mouth.
her mouth.
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lilhellian
| 26
That's the only way I see making a believable fake attempt.. Ok I'm going to ask, am I the only one that can't keep a straight face when reading "stick it into her mouth" or some variance of that?
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a1f0sff
| 25
It appears that you are 22.
By
Twilight_Sparkle_fml
| 8
Bananas, now the most lethal of weapons.
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OhzTP
| 7
For 0.1% of the population
By
kathryn14
| 19
Wow. Harsh.
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Carli_M
| 8
Tough love...
***Didn't see that first comment there, sorry.