Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though. With my cat. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I realised that I have a better relationship with my cat than I do with my boyfriend. FML
Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML
Today, I moved in with my boyfriend. Up until now, I thought my cat was the only four year-old I had to deal with. FML
Today, my cat still loves my boyfriend more than me. I spent around 6 months convincing my boyfriend to get a cat. FML
Today, after I got a cat to help with my anxiety, it turns out he also has anxiety. FML
Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML
Today, I realized I'm trapped. I might be heading into an abusive relationship that I won't be able to escape, but I can't leave because then I'd break his heart and I love him too much for that. FML
Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML
Today, I got a new cat. He's outrageously clingy. Like, "extremely unhealthy obsession with me" clingy. I just wanted an emotional support animal, but it looks like I have become an emotional support animal instead. I feel terrible for trying to get him to not want to be with me all the time. FML
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Top comments
nerdsgetmehot 23
Isn't everyone, really? We let those furry little monsters get away with a lot just because they're cute. My cat abuses me on a regular basis.
lexex1 4
Pussy whipped ;)
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Comments (106)
LADiiL0KA24 11
Wow ur a sad case
MeagsMod 14
Number 3 knows what it's all about. Awe yeah.
KiddNYC1O 22
Take karate lessons like JLo.
ViewtifulRose 6
That doesn't count as a relationship...
mmgc234 0
Kitty cats are cute and evil
nana1212_fml 0
Yea well my dog is trying to take over the world
lulzmylife 4
And this is why I'm a dog person.
BD_Swingin 0
"That pussy it just dominate"
hennessy89 34
Check out theoatmeal.com to learn how you know when your cat is plotting to kill you. Saved my life
MoonPhase123 4
That's pretty sad...