Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though. With my cat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realised that I have a better relationship with my cat than I do with my boyfriend. FML
Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML
Today, I moved in with my boyfriend. Up until now, I thought my cat was the only four year-old I had to deal with. FML
Today, my cat still loves my boyfriend more than me. I spent around 6 months convincing my boyfriend to get a cat. FML
Today, after I got a cat to help with my anxiety, it turns out he also has anxiety. FML
Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML
Today, I realized I'm trapped. I might be heading into an abusive relationship that I won't be able to escape, but I can't leave because then I'd break his heart and I love him too much for that. FML
Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML
Today, I got a new cat. He's outrageously clingy. Like, "extremely unhealthy obsession with me" clingy. I just wanted an emotional support animal, but it looks like I have become an emotional support animal instead. I feel terrible for trying to get him to not want to be with me all the time. FML
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Top comments
nerdsgetmehot 23
Isn't everyone, really? We let those furry little monsters get away with a lot just because they're cute. My cat abuses me on a regular basis.
lexex1 4
Pussy whipped ;)
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Comments (106)
RogueJedi14 1
I'd like to change that. I'm not abusive though
Locoluis 15
YDI for being a crazy cat lady. :)
BBb663 0
If u get the cat fixed it wont act crazy like that.
moviegirl6 5
That is actually not true. The only thing "fixing" a cat does is stop them from spraying pheromones. The boys spray to mark their territory and the girls spray when they're in heat. And, of course, the cat can't have babies after being spayed/neutered.
smirnoff1695 0
Poor kitty cat:(
KociaQ 30
We choose for this. But we still love them.
PokeTrainer97 0
Same here man. Same here.
loserman67 36
Well, someone already used pussy whipped - which I expected, so: You're letting yourself be abused by a 3 to 5 pound animal with the brain the size of a ******* walnut? Sounds to me like you're the pussy in the house. Not that i am endorsing animal abuse, but: A few good whacks with a stiff broom.... A few good kicks to the face.... A few soakings with a spray gun or hose.... A few trips to the microwave.... You'll straighten that asshole cat out PDFQ.... Or buy a big dog and let it eat the cat
gabe_2011 1
Get rid of it duh!
lucyinthesky420 10
Were in the same boat... They're all cute and cuddly then bam, they attack you. ^.,.^
winterxroses 3
After a year and a half? guessing that's about how old kitty is. Your cat is still a kitten, he/she will grow out of it. May kittens are the same way. I have scars all over my hand from them clawing me.
lucyinthesky420 10
My cat is 13! :)