Today, after 2 weeks of hard work in the heat planting a garden, just as I thought the most stressful part was over, my wife's mother comes over and brings a huge dog. She then threw a tennis ball for the dog into my freshly seeded garden multiple times, completely destroying most of it. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML
Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weed-whacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgot that I was mowing where the dogs take dumps, I absentmindedly whacked over dog poop… which got flung into my face. FML
Today, I hate my wife’s dog. It destroys everything in the house, it destroys my garden, she barks constantly in her bed, and when I walk her she tries to attack every living thing she sees, but the instant I talk to my wife about her behaviour, I get yelled at for being mean. FML
Today, I had to water my entire garden. After an exhausting hour of watering hundreds of plants, I turned off the hose and started to feel good about the grueling job. That is, until it started pouring rain. FML
Today, I was woken up by my wife calling the police because our garden had been ransacked during the night. A whole row of houses has had their plants uprooted, greenhouses broken into and garden tools stolen. The cops haven't found any leads and I feel terrible for my wife, who poured her heart and soul into that garden. FML
Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML
Today, three weeks after I finally tried my hand at gardening by planting a bunch of herbs and was so proud of my work, I found out that I had actually been watering weeds this whole time. My herbs were actually the things I was trying to eliminate. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, I finished building a porch I've worked hard on for the past 2 weeks, and I was very proud on how amazing it turned out. Within 20 minutes of it being completed, my pregnant dog decided to crawl underneath it to have her puppies. I had to take half the porch apart to get to her and them. FML
Today, I bent down to pick up my dog’s mangled tennis ball at the park. At the exact same moment, someone’s Great Dane ran full speed into me from behind, knocking me face-first into the mud. My dog then ran off with another family. FML
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Top comments
marcus903 17
Kick her out since she has no respect for others people.
MegaExplosives 17
make her replant everything
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Comments (60)
AshleyLuvsFrank 12
After the 2nd time I would've grabbed the ball and chucked it down the street. Also, I may have given "Mommy" a swift kick in the ass!
ragnarok1540 39
Grab the tennis ball and throw it at your mother-in-law. Hopefully her big dog will knock the old hag off her feet ... and maybe even knock some sense into her.
xXBlakDayXx 17
And you say there and watched...
newbiemalestr8 27
Damn kinda harsh, but well you did make sure he'll never ever want to get back with you now.
newbiemalestr8 27
oops I meant to post this on another FML, I guess subconsciously I figured you wanted to take care of the situation like that other poster
jbivens1992 17
And you just allowed that? OP, youre the man, its your home, your garden. If she isnt going to be respectful then kick her out or say something. In-laws suck, maybe not all of them...but apparently yours do.
Bitchpuddin 7
O **** that!!! I hope you said something to her. And where the hell was yall's wife??? I would have lost it.
StarkWolf_fml 23
I have a feeling she did it on purpose
GrumpyGrinch 23
She turned up with some random huge dog, not her dog? That was on purpose most probably! She had to get the dog from somebody, speaks of preparation. Now the question how did she know there was a garden to destroy? Check possible leak of information - your wife or kids? Who tipped her off? And why?
Viper_Revenge 10
Tell her not to come back
ubergamer08 8
it's ok my wife's mom hates me and takes extra steps to make my life miserable as well