Today, despite me being a master-level carpenter, and my art sells for thousands, I heard my mom telling her snobby friends how embarrassed she is of me because I’m “basically unemployed” and waste my time on “hobby crafts” like a teenage nerd instead of getting “a real job” and finding a wife. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother once again called me to remind me what a disappointment I am despite having two degrees, a house, a professional job and having never been unemployed at 25. FML
Today, once again, my mom chewed me out for, “playing games on the computer all day.” I’m not playing, it’s 3D modeling, and it’s my job. FML
Today, after having spent years staying in school, working hard to achieve good grades, and avoiding all the bad kids, my mom accused me of having no direction in life and complained about how I haven't given her a grandchild yet. I'm 19. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me a pep talk to boost my self confidence. Somehow, it ended up turning into a conversation about how much of a loser I am and how I have no friends. FML
Today, I excitedly told my mom how I got accepted to the master’s program of my dreams. She decided now would be a good time to proudly repeat for the millionth time how she gave up a full ride to the Ivy League to marry my father, and I ought to be a "good woman" and do the same. FML
Today, I told my mom that I got into National Honor Society and Beta Club. Most parents are proud but not her. She told me to get a job and that she was tired of my school shit. FML
Today, my dad called me a "worthless human being", and told me that I'm "better off committing crimes and living life in a prison cell", all because I haven't gotten into the industry I studied for right out of college. I'm currently at a temp job doing accounting. FML
Today, years of talks and months of family therapy, paid for out of my pocket, with my wife and mother-in-law, amounted to nothing. My brother-in-law, who skipped it, gets to stay unemployed while my 72 year-old mother-in-law lets him drain her finances to take a community college math class and build Star Wars dioramas. He's 36. FML
Today, I realized that even though I was an honor student throughout school, and considered the golden child who was going to go far in life, all I've accomplished a year after graduation is becoming an unemployed single mother still living with my parents. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend home to meet my family. The first thing my mom said to him was, “Oh, you can do so much better. Like a paint huffer or a crack whore.” She was serious, and my entire family nodded in agreement. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Anderling 33
From your description of your mother, anything that isn’t a doctor, lawyer or investment banker was never going to be good enough. And that’s her problem, not yours.
D J's MOM 17
so just tell them that they "probably couldn't afford your work" with your nose way up in the air. mwaahaaaa!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (10)
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Well, now you know what your next project is, a throne made of money.
Karenpalombo66 2
Hi Earl
D J's MOM 17
so just tell them that they "probably couldn't afford your work" with your nose way up in the air. mwaahaaaa!
Anderling 33
From your description of your mother, anything that isn’t a doctor, lawyer or investment banker was never going to be good enough. And that’s her problem, not yours.
Thaylok 17
Sell your work to all of her friends (and charge what is truly worth no price breaks for family friends). Then let them tell your mother that you are much more successful than she realizes.
RichardPencil 32
Tell your mom's friends that you're self-employed and try to sell them your art. Make an ornate coffin with your mom's name on it and put it on display at the local art museum with the title "Bitch Box"
catalysty 23
That was a nasty thing for your mom to say. I wish I had your skills!
Yudith 28
Your mom would probably tell Jesus he's "basically unemployed" and is "wasting his time on hobby crafts like a teenage nerd". And where's His wife?
SirEnigM0nk 22
I can see that, and then He would probably just smile and forgive her for her behavior.
SirEnigM0nk 22
You are well-carved, you got this, let me give you a slant. You got the skills to pay the bills, but see it she can't. Let her be, move up, move on.
JasonThorn 24
Call a friend, wait until your mom is in the room, and ask your friend, "I'm planning for the future. What is the cheapest NURSING HOME in ALASKA?"
IHaveThePower 18
Go buy a really expensive Rolex and brag endlessly to her about it the way she brags to her friends. Bonus points for really femme delivery.