Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, dropped a condom on the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I had great sex and afterward decided to take a shower together. He left the room to get some towels, so I went to the bathroom and wait. I walked out of his room wearing nothing but a thong and ran into his mom who had come home from work early. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. His mom didn’t know much about it, and she walked in on us. After about 5 minutes she came back up, threw a box of condoms at us, says, "Continue" and walked out. We were still fucking while she was in the room. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML
Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML
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Top comments
wrw28405 0
I think that's a pretty kick ass mom.
GravyIsYummy 0
So, did you keep it safe?
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Comments (301)
jessica21194 0
HAHAHA favorite one i've read.
pommeblossom 0
At least your mom was cool about it. If that was my child, which I have no children because I'm only sixteen, I would yank her out. Or something along those lines.
marxmarv 0
You still have time to outgrow your programming.
abandonship 3
how is this an FML? thats awesomeeeee
bethechange_fml 0
How is that an FML!?!??!?!?!?! Thats sweeet
Anarchy_fml 0
I wish I had your mom!
SawXXVV111 0
lol Nice
filgeram27 0
Don't you guys lock the doors?
Lythiaren 8
It could be worse, it could've been your dad with a bat. :V Seriously though, your mother sounds pretty cool. Wish my mom was that laid-back.
kingofstuff 0
how come number twenty is buried when it's true? people are retarded
Melephant_fml 0
Your mom sounds awesome.