Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML
Today, someone told my girlfriend that I cheated on her. I've never cheated in my life. Instead of talking to me about it, she made a big post on Facebook about what a dick I am. Pretty much all the comments went along the lines of "What a bastard." and "Ugh, men are pigs." FML
Today, I told my girlfriend over MSN that we had to talk. I log on to facebook and the first thing I see is that she changed our relationship from "In a Relationship" to "It's Complicated." FML
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML
Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML
Today, I got a new girlfriend. Unfortunately, the last girl I asked out just responded to my relationship request on Facebook. It's been 4 hours, and my new girlfriend already thinks I'm cheating on her. FML
Today, my now ex-girlfriend posted on Facebook that I called her a "fucking bitch". Our mutual friends were all outraged, and demanded that I treat her with respect. What she failed to mention was that I said it after finding out that she's been sleeping with my "best friend" for the past year. FML
Today, I had the displeasure of watching my boyfriend’s Facebook go from “In a relationship” with me to “Single”, then switched to a big “In a relationship with” the girl he told me was “just a friend” post, after ending our 5-year relationship over text message. FML
Today, after dating my girlfriend for about a month, she changed her Facebook status to taken. When I saw the update, I immediately clicked "Like." Then I looked up and saw I wasn't the person she had put herself in a relationship with. FML
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Top comments
gracehi 33
You call your hand, "Jill?" Good name I suppose. I call my fancy shower head, "Leo."
mjoyn98 1
Explain it to your girlfriend if she's a keeper she'll understand. If she doesn't, you're probably better off with Jill. . .
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Comments (69)
THE_A_TEEN 28
It really takes "Jack and Jill" to a whole new level, eh.
loserboii 11
In a new relationship while already with your girlfriend? (;
GoBlues2011 0
Can't even get mad, that's a cute ass puppy
PaulB123 11
Your going to have your girlfriend apologising To your hand pretty soon, saying she didn't know you two were together and if she had she never would have dated you.
Haaskyle 2
You're*...apologizing*
ManUrLifeSucks 1
Tell her Jill only helps when shes not there
jillianmathers12 13
Nice to know my name I well used!
perdix 31
I used to have a friend named Jill. I'd called her Jillsy in an aristocratic British accent. It was great fun.
trina101 0
I hope your relationship is ok
hahayourmom101 5
Jill- hold your left hand out, palm down, or right hand, palm up. and from your thumb to tip of index finger- J. in between the next fingers are the "I" "L" and "L"
Sparks808 10
Other way around. Left hand is palm up, right is palm down.
RedPillSucks 33
So if you're left handed, her name is Llij ? What if you're dyslexic?
OHai15 12
i have two, Jill and Llij. ... ambidextrous. :)
perdix 31
Wait until Rosie Palms and her five sisters find out!
KriiFahMoro 9
Or Palmela Handerson
hahayourmom101 5
Oh yeah sorry... other way around.
Dajucy1 7
no, it wanks