Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML
Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML
Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd been going to for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML
Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML
Today, I was at a water park with my family. They wanted me to stand underneath this big bucket filled with water. I didn't know it tips over, and my swimsuit isn't the tightest, so when all the water fell down, my swimsuit bottoms fell to my knees in front of tons of kids. FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. I was throwing a stick in the lake so he could go get it (he loves swimming). A friend called me. After I was done calling, another friend came by, and we talked for a while. When my dog barked, I accidentally threw my iPhone into the water instead of his stick. FML
Today, at work as a cashier, a guy came up with a cart full of stuff and it took me 10 minutes to ring it all up. When I told him his total, he felt his pockets, said, "Oh shit, I forgot my wallet!" and walked off. He left about 15 bags worth of things for me to put back. FML
Today, at the daycare center that I volunteer at, a 5 year-old boy asked me, "What do you do when you really want something?" I told him to try his best to get it and give it his best. He ended up stealing from the donation box and when he was caught he said that I told him to do it. FML
Today, my mother stopped speaking to me because I won’t let her babysit anymore. Her idea of babysitting is to sit my daughter alone with a tablet and a pile of sugary junk food for 7 hours straight. FML
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Top comments
PrimeEvilTahir 24
Well make sure u dont save his life if he ever needs the help...
Il_Maestro 6
What a waste of soda
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Comments (71)
Glassmaster 0
This is why normal people hate teenagers.
hockeyoceancity 13
You look 16-18...
chabaseball1816 6
Haha. I'm a guard too, I hate kids like that
digitaljunky 5
Mario bros has that effect on some people ;)
PenguinSwag47 0
Wrong FML?
dnjohns 3
I'm a lifeguard too and I've had kids spit at me but never throw soda. sorry for the rotten luck :/
missunderstanded 5
I bet the flies loved you!
RissaTee 1
Being a lifeguard as well all I can say is that that sucks but if that ever happens again you should just make the kid sit out for 10 minutes to piss him/her off
ArrickMorris 4
Okay if someone throws a soda at a guard am only has to sit out for 10 minutes that's just gonna say to everyone else that you can assault the guard and no serious action will be taken. Honestly the kid needs to not be allowed back until next season. Hopefully by that time he may have developed some maturity.
RubySlippers84 11
guess what that is assault, you could legally file a complaint with the police. You should report it to your manager .
florencesummer 0
... and you couldnt use your towel to wipe it off? Or ask for a towel/paper towel?
chokefrantic 9
Why didn't you lick it off? Soda is delicious.
stevenmx86 8
I hate not being able to reply to comments from this app. But, no 64, that's not about right. I mean get off your stupid chair, wipe your self clean with a towel and get back on. I don't think it'd take more than 20 seconds to wipe off with a towel. You don't even need to take your eyes off of the bulk of the pool. I really don't even see where I suggested he "give the kid a pounding"..