Squatters' rights

By Anonymous - 10/01/2021 08:01

Today, I had the best date I've had in my life, until after we ate and split an expensive dinner out, we came back to my place and she then told me she was homeless, and wasn't looking to date but for a couch to crash on. She won't leave. Happy fucking New Year. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 261
You deserved it 265

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I don't see the problem. You have the best date of your life right there in your house! Play your cards right and she'll make the short move from your couch to your bed soon. Don't fuck it up with a stupid promise ring!

start recording and call the cops.

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start recording and call the cops.

The cops aren't going to do anything. You've got a beautiful woman living at your house -- they're not going to feel sorry for you. Like when those neighborhood kids ditched their Ferraris on my lawn so they could drive Kias ironically. The cops thought I should be grateful.

I realize Richard is joking but he's also not entirely wrong. A lot of cops would not, in fact, care, and are very heavily biased.

I don't see the problem. You have the best date of your life right there in your house! Play your cards right and she'll make the short move from your couch to your bed soon. Don't fuck it up with a stupid promise ring!

Call the police. She doesn't get squatters rights when she just got there.

Yep, it's now called trespassing when they won't leave. Even if it's a guest. If they wont leave nicely, call the police. Record all conversations and honestly, start the restraining order now. You think I'm nuts? People GO NUTS when they are punished for doing shit like this. There is a high possibility she will come back and trespass again or vandalize your property. Sorry OP. Good luck!

"hello, police....?

She must be psycho. The bad thing is, telling her to leave you alone will only make it worse. Just tie her to your bed! Nah, let the cops handcuff her while you put your home on lockdown from intruders.