Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I had such a violent coughing fit that my stomach emptied itself all over the floor while at my sales job. FML
Today, I took a swig of my Dr Pepper while having a meeting with my manager. As soon as I was about to swallow, I began coughing, and spat a whole mouthful all over her face. FML
Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling well at work. While I was in the bathroom losing my lunch, a very large piece of food came up. The resulting splash of toilet water went straight up into my mouth. FML
Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML
Today, out of nowhere, I started violently choking on my own saliva and shat myself in the process. FML
Today, at work, I had a coughing fit so bad I actually shat myself. What felt like a gallon of liquid crap poured down my trouser leg onto the floor. I work in a competitive office and this happened in front of 30 spiteful coworkers who love posting pics online. FML
Today, while giving speech in class, I choked on my own spit and had a coughing fit while everyone stared at me intently. When I finally regained my composure, my teacher told me my time was up and to sit down. I hadn't even got finished the first paragraph. FML
Today, I was preparing a customer's meal in my restaurant's kitchen, when I choked on my own saliva and went into a coughing fit. The head chef, who's always hated my guts, accused me of trying to hock a loogie into the meal and fired me on the spot. FML
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Top comments
acneegg 7
Sounds like something from Drag Me To Hell
lafrenchie 4
You'm had a panic attack, huh?
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Comments (70)
cyppy11 3
I would've like to seen that look on your face the instant the granny spit hit your mouth. Damn that sucks!!
deseanmoore 0
gross!!
lekiat 0
ewwwwwww!!
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
I'm had a panic attack?
Darkblade21 20
slap dat bitch!
sum1two 0
I would have been throwing up till I fainted.
Fuck_yo_mamma 0
Wowwwww !i FeEl b@d foR y0u s0n !'m tRYinG to HElp mi mOmmY sTop Do!n ThAt...
_GODZILLA_ 0
Oh my God, I gagged reading that. Nasty! People are frigging gross! Did I ever tell you about the time I took a crap in Mechagodzilla's neck?
shelbylaineeee 0
im the one who posted this! and the whole "i'm had a panic attack.".. number one. i didnt say it tasted "vile" i said "i could taste it on my tongue" THEN i said, "I'm a germaphobe, and i had a panic attack at work" i dont know what happened here hahahaha. i was reading it, and i was like I DIDNT SAY THAT. but she DIDNT realize what she did. she walked off. i would have probably punched her if i didnt go into shock hahahah.
5t3ff1k4h 47
I find it a strange coincidence that you mention this was your story when a similar situation happened earlier today. I am in no way saying you're lying, it just seems rather coincidental.
shelbylaineeee 0
im sure this has happened to plenty of people. i just know that this one is mine