Health, Relatable and Cancer: Punchline man

Punchline man

By Anonymous - 09/07/2022 06:00

Today, thanks to the hormone treatments for my cancer, I have gained so much weight I am now officially the punchline for “How does a fat man find his penis? With a mirror on a stick and an erection.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 087

You deserved it 161

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Same thing different taste

Thicker than blood

By fat fat fat fat fat - 23/03/2021 05:01

Today, despite the fact that I’ve been battling cancer for the past year and was hospitalized for Covid, all my family can talk about is how much weight I’ve gained. Yeah, not like being out of work, quarantined and on a ton of meds has anything to do with it. Thanks guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 389

You deserved it 111

Thanks for the miracle

By howinthenameofholyfuck?! - 16/07/2020 17:01

Today, after being diagnosed with breast cancer, enduring months of tortuous chemo, having painful radiation treatments and having had my tubes tied, I realized I’ve become the butt of an incredibly cruel cosmic joke. I got pregnant from the one-night stand I had to celebrate beating cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 236

You deserved it 634

Turtle

By Anonymous - 18/04/2023 21:00 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, even though I diet and go to the gym, due to my hypothyroidism I'm now so overweight that when I went to hospital for an unrelated check up, the gorgeous nurse actually had to press and move around my fat-filled groin to make my penis pop out of its hiding place under the skin. I hate myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 263

You deserved it 292

Deez Nuts

By ALittleLighter - 14/09/2021 05:00

Today, I finally lost some weight. Unfortunately, that's only because I had a testicle removed due to cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 78

By dawg3360 - 07/06/2009 06:02 - Canada

Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 643

You deserved it 134 219

By yawho - 25/02/2009 07:25 - Japan

Today, a customer that I've been waiting on for years came into the restaurant after a long absence. I said to him, "Hey man, it looks like you lost a lot of weight! How'd you do it?" He replied, "I got cancer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 389

You deserved it 9 866

By stillyoung - 02/11/2010 06:50 - Australia

Today, I discovered that the upside of losing weight is that men have started hitting on me. The downside? They're all twice my age. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 710

You deserved it 4 429

By brittrod - 05/12/2011 01:13 - United States

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 054

You deserved it 3 388

Chubby Love, by Bon Iver

By Anonymous - 11/12/2021 07:59

Today, I realised that my husband and I have gotten so fat that his already small dick no longer even reaches me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 927

You deserved it 1 525

By Anonymous - 10/02/2012 16:12 - United States

Today, I noticed that I have gained enough weight to give me back boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 821

You deserved it 34 707

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 9 July 2022 17:36

Neither is he? Hahahahahaha!

DrewBaby 8

Saturday 9 July 2022 9:13

I’m not touching this

Comments

DrewBaby 8

Saturday 9 July 2022 9:13

I’m not touching this

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 9 July 2022 17:36

Neither is he? Hahahahahaha!

IHaveThePower 16

Sunday 10 July 2022 1:43

So? Go rest up and get better from cancer. I'm over 300 lbs and it doesn't stop me doing jack shit (asthma, of course, can go **** itself, but that's another problem...). Hell, I've hiked up the Trinity Alps with no training (don't do that, it's ******* stupid) and didn't even pass out! Seriously, though. Being fat just means you move differently. Plenty of people will still want to bang you, and you can do whatever you want. Don't worry about it. (Also if you ever do altitude hiking train first.)