Today, I managed to "permanently and irrevocably" damage my spine. How? By bending down and picking up a piece of paper. According to my doctor, essentially I need to, "bend over like a stripper if I want to pick something up." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to improve my posture by sitting through all of my classes with my shoulders and back completely straight. Pretty soon I couldn't move my shoulders at all. I had to go to the chiropractor. It turns out that in trying to improve my posture, I misaligned my spine instead. FML
Today, I went to my doctor to get my x-ray results. Turns out, I have a fractured spine and a chip of my spine has moved. Now I'm in a neck brace because my dad didn't think it was serious, and told me to "suck it up princess." FML
Today, I picked up a 7lb stick vacuum like I do regularly, except this time it caused a disc in my spine to slip and pinch a nerve and now I can't walk right or sleep. FML
Today, I went to sit on a desk chair, which promptly rolled out from under me. This made me fall on my own foot, literally shattering two bones. I just bought a 9-month gym membership and can't use it because I wanted to sit down. FML
Today, I somehow miscounted the steps on the staircase I've used multiple times a day for 20 years, then fell all the way to the bottom. Doctors say I fractured my coccyx, which is basically the ass bone at the bottom of my spine. I can neither sit or lie on my back for at least 6 weeks. FML
Today, after years of martial arts training, ballet, and dance, I thought I had pretty good balance for a dude. Then I accidentally stuck both legs in one side of my pants and tipped head first into the wall. The ER doctor has scheduled a test for TBI, and the vertigo “may be permanent.” FML
Today, I had an accident at work. Not the kind involving worker's compensation. The kind involving desperately scrubbing my office chair with paper towels, before going home to change my pants. FML
Today, being my usual clumsy self, I slipped on the stairs and landed on my tailbone. Hard. Now, I can't even sit up. I have to drive to school and sit on a very hard plastic chair for four and a half hours tomorrow. FML
Today, I received the good news that my spine looks normal. Either the degenerative disc that was diagnosed 5 years prior magically healed, or my current doctor is an idiot. Considering that it's felt like someone is chiseling into my spine for some days, I'm leaning toward the latter. FML
Today, I learned the hard way that age is not just a number when I completely threw out my back while sitting on the ground, gently tossing a ball. FML
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Top comments
snappleb7 12
I’d get a second opinion ASAP
Undiscovered_X 8
Could try and kneel whenever you pick up any fallen items.
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Comments (8)
alexwagner21 25
I’m sorry, what?
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
stretch more you ******* fossil
Undiscovered_X 8
Could try and kneel whenever you pick up any fallen items.
Yudith 28
Excellent advice. After a Pilates class, I had the Lumbago-from-Hell and I had to walk to my doctor like a 90-year-old grandma with arthritis. Since then, instead of bending over to pick up stuff on the floor, I sit on my heels. My knees have never felt better! Plus, I can drop it like it's hot now.
ahabsfan 17
Somebody come git her she’s dancing like a stripper.
xxlk4xx 6
I feel you on this one! I have a finicky back as well and I walk and stretch as much as I can! last month I put my back out by slightly leaning over the counter to wash my face! luckily I was better after about 4 days tho, I found tying an ice back to my back with a scarf helped as well as the extra strength ibuprofen from Costco seemed to help a lot! rest when you need to but make sure to carefully move around so your muscles dont get more bogged up, so gentle stretches to keep things loose, and if you CAN try to go see a chiropractor if you havnt already, I know they can be pricey tho. hopefully this helps a bit, I'm sorry you have to deal with this!
snappleb7 12
I’d get a second opinion ASAP
bloopaloop 27
That’s some great healthcare you got there
jfigley 5
Its called, you tweaked a muscle/nerve....done this before putting on socks or deadlifts at the gym. It'll heal....