Gross, Motorbike and Animals: Protein

Protein

By Nearly Crashed - 27/05/2013 13:42 - United States - Lake Hiawatha

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 459

You deserved it 9 103

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Same thing different taste

By jelrid - 13/07/2016 04:38 - United States - Holt

Today, my worst fears were realized as an insect pinged off the back of my mouth while I was singing along to the radio on my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 921

You deserved it 3 953

By Knaxer - 12/12/2015 17:22 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, I was riding my motorcycle when a guy cut me off at a light. I honked and swore at him when a bug flew into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 955

You deserved it 6 576

Night terrors

By Si123 - 15/08/2020 08:01

Today, after a long day at work, I was ready to wind down for the night. I sat on my bed and turned towards a fluttering on my left. I saw the biggest daddy-longlegs inches from my face, jumped in the other direction, forgetting there was a wall, and hit my head on it. I'm now officially wide awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 246

You deserved it 242

By Brandon Butler - 04/03/2011 09:22

Today, I was riding my motorcycle on the highway and wearing all of my gear - boots, gloves, jacket, and full-face helmet. Somehow a bee found the only spot not covered on my body and stung my neck. I'm allergic to bees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 630

You deserved it 2 994

By Anonymous - 16/04/2015 02:41 - Australia

Today, I got up feeling refreshed and positive for the first time in ages, so I happily threw my window open to greet the beautiful morning. A bee flew into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 784

You deserved it 3 131

By Anonymous - 27/07/2014 18:44 - Germany - Oberursel

Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 699

You deserved it 5 379

By Anonymous - 17/05/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, I was on a bike ride when a bug flew into my eye. Not wanting to stop, I figured I would just keep that eye closed until I could cry it out. Five seconds later, a bug flew into my other eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 956

You deserved it 8 687

By Anonymous - 08/09/2009 19:02 - United States

Today, as I was walking through the park I had to yawn. In mid-yawn, with my mouth wide open, I walked right through a spider web getting both the spider and the prey it was eating stuck in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 602

You deserved it 8 243

Fancy a pint?

By Anonymous - 04/09/2020 22:02 - United States - Tyler

Today, while I was relaxing outside drinking a beer after a long day, a moth decided to fly right into my ear canal. I instinctively threw my hand up to swat it out. With the same hand holding the beer. I soaked the side of my face and down my ear. At least I got the bug out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 300

By jreed509 - 03/07/2011 05:25 - United States

Today, while riding a roller coaster I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough it somehow managed to survive and fell down my shirt. It crawled around and bit me a few times before the ride ended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 784

You deserved it 4 115

Mr_Satan 11

Monday 27 May 2013 19:22

Today, I was minding my own damn business, having a good time flying around, when this bastard motorized two-legged thing sped through and swallowed me whole. I'm being digested as I type this... FML.

dancinggirl900 17

Monday 27 May 2013 19:16

Insect got your tongue?

Comments

slickchrome 11

Tuesday 28 May 2013 15:15

Cool story bro

WonkeyDonkey 10

Tuesday 28 May 2013 16:37

Almost happen to me today too. Was yawning with my mouth wide open (both hands pushing my daughter) when I saw a big winged thing heading towards me. Got my mouth shut in time but the bastard still bitch slapped me in the face :/

mindlesskay 11

Tuesday 28 May 2013 17:50

invest in a car so it doesn't happen again.

natheitz 23

Tuesday 28 May 2013 18:39

Never refuse a free meal

nplatinum 4

Wednesday 29 May 2013 4:04

It's protein! Just like semen! I'll let yours fly into my mouth if you want?

kathoward21 4

Wednesday 29 May 2013 5:14

My dad once had an owl fly into him. One of the talons scratched the corner of his eye and miraculously didn't damage his eye. He was lucky he didn't wreck because the owl hit him so hard he lost his vision for a minute.