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By  Chazzster  |  21

That needs more context. Were you talking about him becoming the father of your “children to be” perhaps too soon in the relationship? Were you asking him to be your “daddy” in your own relationship? Or has boyfriend had a prior bad experience with a prior “fatherless girlfriend”?

Fatherhood and parenthood in general are big responsibilities (the reason some men and boys run away from that responsibility) and not everyone is ready for that kind of obligation. But people often change at different stages in life, so that doesn’t mean that you won’t ever meet someone ready to be a husband and/or father.

If the issue is a prior bad relationship with a prior “fatherless girlfriend” that’s not really your fault. But sometimes if you get burned, then you stay far away from anything that seems like that bad experience - So maybe it’s not entirely boyfriend’s “fault” either.

The sad truth is that there will usually be more failed or un-launched relationships than there will be good long term relationships. That’s what dating is really about - weeding out relationships that won’t work and finding one that will. It’s also sometimes a time of self-discovery when we fine tune our appearance and social skills to present an enticing but authentic version of ourselves. Ultimately you have to be yourself - If you act like or pretend to be someone else, how will you find someone who likes you as you are? But some disclosures may be best revealed a bit more slowly if there is a risk of misunderstanding.

By the way, it’s also possible that the breakup had little to do with the reason you were given. Sometimes people lie to cover other decisions they have made. But regardless of the truth or not of the reason you were given - It’s over now. Give yourself an appropriate time to grieve what was not to be and move on. It’s pointless to stalk an ex or obsess over what they are doing now - That only prevents or delays your healing and finding another relationship.

By  Fata Morgana 1029  |  8

Sadly, I've seen a lot of "men" decide that a woman who grew up without a father HAS to be crazy. They're also the ones who tend to think tattoos and piercings (outside of one in each lobe) means a woman sleeps around. You don't need this dude OR his mentality.

COMMENTS
By  Chazzster  |  21

That needs more context. Were you talking about him becoming the father of your “children to be” perhaps too soon in the relationship? Were you asking him to be your “daddy” in your own relationship? Or has boyfriend had a prior bad experience with a prior “fatherless girlfriend”?

Fatherhood and parenthood in general are big responsibilities (the reason some men and boys run away from that responsibility) and not everyone is ready for that kind of obligation. But people often change at different stages in life, so that doesn’t mean that you won’t ever meet someone ready to be a husband and/or father.

If the issue is a prior bad relationship with a prior “fatherless girlfriend” that’s not really your fault. But sometimes if you get burned, then you stay far away from anything that seems like that bad experience - So maybe it’s not entirely boyfriend’s “fault” either.

The sad truth is that there will usually be more failed or un-launched relationships than there will be good long term relationships. That’s what dating is really about - weeding out relationships that won’t work and finding one that will. It’s also sometimes a time of self-discovery when we fine tune our appearance and social skills to present an enticing but authentic version of ourselves. Ultimately you have to be yourself - If you act like or pretend to be someone else, how will you find someone who likes you as you are? But some disclosures may be best revealed a bit more slowly if there is a risk of misunderstanding.

By the way, it’s also possible that the breakup had little to do with the reason you were given. Sometimes people lie to cover other decisions they have made. But regardless of the truth or not of the reason you were given - It’s over now. Give yourself an appropriate time to grieve what was not to be and move on. It’s pointless to stalk an ex or obsess over what they are doing now - That only prevents or delays your healing and finding another relationship.

By  Fata Morgana 1029  |  8

Sadly, I've seen a lot of "men" decide that a woman who grew up without a father HAS to be crazy. They're also the ones who tend to think tattoos and piercings (outside of one in each lobe) means a woman sleeps around. You don't need this dude OR his mentality.