Today, while I was applying some eyeliner, my cat jumped onto the counter and managed to headbutt me. The wand scratched a good portion of my eyeball, and now for the next few weeks, I will have to deal with the pain of a corneal abrasion. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was attempting to tame my bushy eyebrows, since I'm starting a new job in a few days and need to look somewhat presentable, when I poked myself in the eye. Hard. I thought I’d blinded myself for a few moments. Now it’s just red, sore and watery. FML
Today, I applied mascara directly onto my eyeball. FML
Today, while getting ready for a friend's wedding, I was curling my eyelashes. My cat decided to jump onto the towel rod. As I went to catch her, I ripped all the eyelashes out of one eye. I called my boyfriend crying. When he saw me, he laughed and said, "You look really surprised in that eye." FML
Today, my cat sneezed directly into my open eyeball. FML
Today, I was tinting my own eyelashes when I missed my eyelashes and stabbed myself in the eye with the applicator loaded with dye. Now, I have beautiful lush black eyelashes, to match my half-closed swollen red left eye. Sexy. FML
Today, my ill-tempered cat tried to slap me in the face. She ended up sticking one of her claws as far up my nostril as it would go, and got stuck. Not only did I kinda get to experience what it feels like to be stabbed, I also got a horrible nosebleed. FML
Today, I was eating a donut and watching TV with my cat. I saw a dark glob on my shirt and ate it, thinking it was dropped icing. It was my cat's earwax. Disgusted, I ran to the bathroom and tried to rinse with hydrogen peroxide. I sprayed it in my eye. FML
Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML
Today, I was laying in bed, scrolling through my phone, when my cat swatted my phone out of my hand. It hit me in the face and popped a pimple, which is now bleeding. FML
Today, I accidentally stepped on my cat's paw and she let out a deafening screech of pain. After treating her like a queen for the rest of the day as an apology, I accidentally kicked her in the dark, sending her flying up against the wall. I feel as though I should sleep with one eye open tonight. FML
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Top comments
Trisha_aus 15
Eyeliners are evil...My friend almost had the same thing happen to her..except it wasn't a cat..it was me
itwasallyellow 0
Were you doing a cat eye? ;)
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Comments (146)
thecubie123 0
Nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan
kirklandcn1983 2
Ur cornea heals over night....u will b fine
Marchingband44 4
This sucks. I had a water gun shot at face from 3ft away they missed and shot my eye. On the bright side, your eye is the fastest healing body part in your whole body so it won't take but a few days actually. Even over night you will start to feel a difference.
fknprincess94 0
At least you don't have reisbuctler's cornea distrophy where this thing happens as the slightests touch to the eye. Trust me it's tragic!!!!
MizCherryBlossom 15
Just another thing that proves my "cats are evil" theory.
toolman4 1
Longer than a few weeks. I scratched my eye 12 years ago and it still flares up. Feels like a paper cut. Good Luck
mnaqvi 0
Hope ure alright now!
thecouchisalive 20
That's why you shouldn't have a cat
clawstrophobic 15
That 'headbutt' is actually the cat saying, "I love you"
Diddlydoo1632 18
Another reason to never get a cat