Today, I took a run in the woods. Almost halfway through, I started to feel like I was going to faint. I was so dizzy that my sight was getting blurry. I went to sit down on what seemed like a rock. It wasn't a rock. It was a huge snapping turtle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was taking a hike through the Appalachians. I lost my balance in a steep area, and grabbed for a root along the trail above me. It turned to not be a root, but a large, angry snake. FML
Today, I was running outside. On the last mile, I was alongside some fields. While running down the side of the road, I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car, screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML
Today, I was spending some time alone out in the countryside, when I glanced at my boot. I saw a snake, screamed, ran like hell for my car, tripped over my own feet, and smashed my kneecaps. Upon further inspection, I realized the "snake" was my loose shoelace. FML
Today, I saw a turtle on the road so I swerved, and hit a tree. The people behind me then hit the turtle. FML
Today, I ran full speed into a brick wall because I saw a tiger. On the other side of a zoo cage. FML
Today, while stumbling drunkenly down a trail, I saw a sign that said "Watch for Falling Rocks." I spent the next five minutes confused and wondering how I was supposed to know which rocks were planning to fall. FML
Today, I was feeling stressed about some upcoming exams, so I went on a nice relaxing nature walk through the nearby bushland. I slipped off a rock and landed in knee-deep mud that claimed my shoe when I pulled my leg free. I'm even more stressed now. FML
Today, I tried meditating at the park to “be more mindful.” Right as I closed my eyes, a squirrel jumped onto my leg, causing me to scream loud enough to scare a nearby jogger, who then tripped over his own feet. I apologized while shaking uncontrollably. FML
Today, I tripped on a rock, fell in a pond, and lost my phone. All while dressed as a banana for a charity run. FML
Today, I had my first real break from work in ages, so I decided to go hiking. Less than 20 minutes in, I tumbled a couple hundred feet down a steep hill, broke my leg and several toes, and lay there in agony for an eternity before I was finally rescued. FML
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Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
Just run, OP. You'll be the rabbit, and the turtle can be... the turtle.
lordslaya53 14
Oh snap you better run!
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Comments (77)
thatgirlincali 13
They said their vision was blurry.
quanito1013 6
Atleast it was a turtle. Could have been worsts.
Nyx_fml 23
Yes. It could have been Gamera. Or even Bowser. Oh, wait, those are turtles too. :/
rocker_chick105 31
It could've been a worsts? Oh no! Those ******* are terrifying!!
tatsumahyuu 5
Did it get you or did u just sit on it and that was it? Personally I saw a duck get screwed up by a huge one and can only imagine the damage it could do on a human
Kateyez_26 13
Maybe 13 vision was blurry when he read the FML
Faiths28 12
Bet your vision cleard up
thatgirlincali 13
Ah. It's clear to me now. That could be it.
fsomelife 26
We'll remember you as the guy named Carl.
tragicnightmare 15
at least it never harmed you. better a turtle than something worse, right?
mattrd_fml 31
snapping turtles can really hurt you. theres a reason why theyre called snapping turtles.
sadistmonkey 19
Because they taste like ginger snaps right?
tragicnightmare 15
i see. guess i shouldve googled snapping turtles lol. i dont know much about them
dramaelf 37
I guess that woke you up pretty fast.
kiwikoei 10
And then... You woke up?